Have you ever felt helpless?

And did that experience warp your ability to trust yourself and others?

Concerned that you can't tell the difference between self-care and self-sabotage because of what happened to you?

Sometimes bad things happen to good people... I know.

Yet Source wants you to know that all things can - and do - work together to form greater good in our lives.

Watch this week's 11-minute Love Letter to hear my story of overcoming a very dark time in my life and how I healed from cycles of self-sabotage to embracing a lifestyle of self-care and healing.

"I only smoke because it helps me cool off."

We're continuing the series, sourced this time around has asked to continue you and I building a deeper relationship and a deeper understanding about certain concepts that come up in our spiritual lives.

This series is going to be a five week series around the dark side of self-care. Woohoo. I'm so excited.

I am so excited to bring you to the dark side of self-care. What that basically looks like is self-sabotage.

Now this first week in particular the guides have asked me to share more of my story.

I just finished a session with a new client. I'm so excited for her. It's amazing what inspires people to begin their healing journey. She's beginning a new six month healing journey, Sojourner healing journey, which means she's coming in for an hour, a private hour a month for me. She also gets unlimited meditation classes here at the dojo.

It's so interesting to hear people's stories of what inspires them to begin to heal. What motivates you to really begin healing.

It was just fascinating sharing with her some of my story of what caused me to get into all of this in the first place.

Believe it or not, it comes from actually my pain.

Simon Sinek, very beautifully says that your big why comes from your pain more often than not.

For me, it was a series of three breakups that caused me to break open. The first one was someone that I thought I was going to be with. The whole soulmate situation that you think you have and then turns out sleeping with your coworker and calls you on your wedding day to ask how are you? One.

Two, the next one broke me open again because of the color of my skin. He had decided that we couldn't be together because of the color of my skin. That also compounded my perspective.

Then unfortunately the third one that really broke me open was when I got date raped. Yes, I'm sharing that with you.

No, I'm not happy about what happened to me. I honor the fact that these were the events that grabbed my attention that something is not quite right.

Now maybe you grew up with a history of abuse or maybe you grew up with alcoholic parents or that sort of a thing.

Something happened in our lives that forced us to take a stand and say, "Wait a minute. I don't like this. I don't like this." Right?

It's those moments where you put your foot down and say, "No more. I'm not going to be beaten anymore" or, "I'm not going to select people who would do these kinds of things to me anymore."

One of my first spiritual teachers her question to me, that changed my life, was: "what is the pattern in you that's creating this situation?"

This is where we get into our five week deep dive around self-sabotage.

When I look back into those dark times in my life where I would have suicidal thoughts and would be sleeping at around 22 hours a day, only getting up to go to the bathroom and have a sip of water, trying to escape, escape, escape there were things that I was doing to self-soothe that within my compressed mindset I thought were good for me.

When you have a compressed, like as in a really limited mindset, bad stuff you can't really tell that that's bad for you.

Some of the ways that I used to self-soothe but actually turned out being self-sabotage ... Well, one it was the constant sleeping. Also, I used to chain-smoke Clove cigarettes, the black ones. Like talk about breathing death. Emotional stuffing. I used to live on Twix and Chex-Mix and nothing else except for Captain Morgan's spiced rum and Malibu coconut rum. I remember. I'm so happy that I'm sober now.

There's these things that, "I'll just have a drink so that I can soothe" or escape, get rid of this negativity, or, "Let me go have a smoke. Let me cool off." Or, "Let me just check out." There's so many things that we do to soothe ourselves that within a limited and a compressed point of view feel pleasurable and we interpret them as good even though they're working against us.

Now there was also another form of self-sabotage I would do at the time. I would work around 12 hours or so a day at a really, really toxic job. Like screaming bosses that were financial abusers as in dangling your pay check over your head in order to get you to do things that are completely outside of your principles.

Be kind to yourself if as I invoke the darker side of my story that this is resonating for you like, "Ooh, ooh, I still do some of that, Victoria" ... This is not to say like, "I'm good and you're bad." No.

I want you to know that I've been through some things and when I'm going to talk to you over the next few weeks around self-sabotage versus self-care there's some history there. I'm only tapping on the tip of the iceberg here with respect to your energy.

Click to share the Tweet of the Week:

Know this: Be kind to yourself. What motivates great healing is usually great pain.

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My story is my story and it's made me who I am. Here's the light in the darkness is that when you start self-soothing you can choose to raise the vibration of the forms of self-soothing that you do.

For example, I remember even when I was still chain-smoking I started learning more about crystals and oracle cards. "Well, you know, maybe this will help me feel better." It was something positive about these cards or I feel the energy when I'm holding this crystal. I don't know what the heck it is. I'm going to get into that in the next few weeks.

That was the turning point. It was following things that brought me joy and uplifted me in the self-soothing cycle. It's natural.

I want you to know this and watch this in yourself this week.

Watch the way that you soothe yourself, whether it's positive or negative. Just notice how do you soothe yourself when you're feeling bored, when you're feeling depressed, empty, anxious, angry, unacknowledged, lonely, et cetera. How do you soothe yourself? It is positive things? Or negative?

Most of us have a mixture of both. By the way, at the filming of this video I still have some not so good things, such as eating chocolate and ice cream, that is harmful against my body. As well as doing hours of meditation, grounding out in nature, doing reiki. I have a mixture.

This is called being human. I want us to have a deep dive now for the next five weeks around honoring that self-care versus self-sabotage dance that we're all doing.

I know that you're doing it. If you clicked play on this video chances are you're a natural empath. You're already sensitive to the energy and trying to figure out how to cope with all this energetic overload. We're going to confront this head-on.

We're going to dive deep together. I can't wait to see you next week and hear what you think.

Comment below. Tell me what's coming up for you around this.

Do you have a story that you wanted to share, by the way? Did my story bring up some of yours? I would love to witness you in sharing your story, privately, just to honor you. We don't want to post all that out in social media and all over the place.

Send me an email back and let me know and I'd be happy to set up a share your story call so that we can hold space for you speaking your truth for the first time.

I know it's tough. I feel you but we're going to get through this together.

Are you ready for this? Five weeks. Five weeks. Let's do this. Self-care versus self-sabotage. Going to the dark side. Whoop, whoop. Shining light so that we can all grow together. I'm sending you so much love and I'll see you next week. Bye.

VictoriaWhitfield.com
Facebook.com/SenseiVictoriaWhitfield

Just for Today...

Watch the way that you soothe yourself.

Track what you do to soothe negative feelings, to observe if it’s positive self-care or negative self-sabotage behavior..

Notice how you feel at that moment - you're already healing!

-

Hello there. I am Sensei Victoria Whitfield, your business reiki master. And it's my joy to get to support empathic entrepreneurs and business owners like you in getting and staying grounded and clear in mind, body and business.

Welcome back to another installment of your weekly love letter from the dojo at naturalintuition.com and victoriawhitfield.com, my blog. These are your sources for channeled holistic stress management techniques and guidance for developing your natural intuition. Whether you're looking to improve the quality of your personal and professional life, let this love letter be your reminder that you are not alone and that together we can make that happen.

Let's schedule a chat, and see how I can help you...

The post Love Letters | Self Care vs. Self Sabotage – Part 1 of 5 appeared first on Sensei Victoria Whitfield.

Do you seldom feel truly rested?

Is it hard for you to relax, because you secretly think it’s a waste of time?

Wish you could increase your productivity and your wellness, instead of trading one for the other?

Type-A personalities tend to have a hard time really resting and feeling relaxed because they’re wired to value getting as many things done as possible above their feelings and wellbeing.

This can lead to chronic anxiety and stress, as well as cycles of depression and burnout if left unchecked.

Watch this week’s 10-minute Love Letter video, the third in our 4-week series on Your Daily PRP’s, to put an end to this vicious cycle and instead adopt a practice of restful productivity.

"I feel lazy when I take breaks."

This is week three of four in our four-week series on Your Daily PRPs.

If you don't know what PRP stands for, stop the video now and go back to week one where we explained exactly what PRPs are and why you need them. So, without further ado, if you do know what's going on, this week in particular we're going to cover the second letter in that acronym PRP, the R which stands for "Rest."

The reason why we get our daily PRP nutrition in is so that you have the energy and the stamina to pursue your passion and purpose for the long haul. This, when you implement is as a proactive regularized practice, whether it is on a daily basis or weekly, monthly, quarterly, yearly, right? However you schedule it in for yourself, it will stave off or even put an end to cycles of burnout, being overworked, feeling cranky, overwhelmed, and pushing yourself past your limit.

In particular, this week that we're talking about with rest is having restful productivity. I know that kind of sounds like an oxymoron, if I have any of my type As watching. Yay. All my creepy control enthusiasts, all my perfectionistas, yes, yes, where everything has got to be perfect. Be kind to yourself if that's you.

You might be burning the candle at both ends by adopting the type A, get it done perfectly as fast as possible, as efficiently as possible all the time. There's a way to be restful and productive at the same time.

Now, my guides have given me a four-step process to share with you this week in particular so that you can get to implementing restful productivity, so that you have the stamina to pursue your passion and purpose for the long haul. You ready for it?

Number one, unplug. Write this down, by the way. Get a pen and pad or open up another window, whatever you guys do or ... inscribe it on your brains.

Number one, unplug. In order to rest but also to be fully productive, your ability to focus, not just on a mental level but also a physical level is called for and unplugging is necessary. What does that mean? No TV, phone, tablet, laptop, computer, no plugging into technology. The less technology period you can be around ...

I was just talking about stuff that makes you connected to the worldwide webs-y things and cables and stuff. But if you wanna go completely native and have candlelight and all of that, the campfire, great. But, for those of us who are not able to do that, just unplug. Make it a point to unplug so that you can be focused on being restfully productive.

‪Know this: You can be restful AND productive.

Secondly, and this takes courage, it's time for you to rage. So, how are you going to rage? For some people it's getting at that heavy bag, and pow, pow, pow, pow. Let that bag have what it had coming! But, I also highly recommend that you use a written medium for your rage. So, have a rage journal. I have a rage journal, by the way.

Or, grab a piece of toilet paper and start writing on that, all the things that you hate, that annoy you, that make you angry, and cranky and frustrated. Write it out, write it out, write it out. Or, all those extra brown paper bags, time to write all over them. Write of all the things that you wanna get out of you and rage about. This is cathartic clearing. So, that's really going to help you be restful but it's also productive because you're bringing stuff up and out, getting it out of you.

Thirdly, is to release. The way that you release this practice is you can close the journal and leave it behind for a little bit, if you are okay with that. Or, if you need ultra secrecy take that toilet paper, flush it down the toilet. Let the crap go where it's supposed to, down the toilet pipes, right? Or, with your brown paper bag, rip it up into tiny pieces or even throw it in the fire pit and watch it burn. Bye-Bye! Right? Burn that crusty crap away.

So, release all of that energy that came out of you. Then leave it be. That you could do it for an hour, leave it be for an hour afterward, or even entire day, or week, who knows? What's important is the fourth and final step, and this is what makes it super productive, is to review. What came out of you, what you raged about, what makes you angry is actually what I call a dark gift, meaning a gift that comes in a darker kind of, not very attractive package, right? It's a learning gift.

So, the things that you raged about are signs and hints at where your boundaries are being overstepped. If you have any boundaries with love, right? Where you need more support in your life, in your business, or in your relationships. Where your desires are not being met. There's so much clarity that comes from raging and releasing and the review, that's fourth and final step, is essential for you grounding and receiving all of the gifts that came out of this restful productivity process at the end.

So, this is how to find your way through the resting process. Those of us who are type As, we tend to go on vacation, or enjoy the spa or have downtime and we're being as productive and go, go, go, as possible. We can't seem to turn off, can't seem to let go, because we gotta do everything on the list that we said we were going to do.

The reason why that happens is because you have pent up rage that you haven't released yet. So, this is your four steps process to be restful and productive. And you can do this. You can work it in, in many ways on a daily basis, in a little bit bigger ways on a weekly basis, more of a significant time space on the monthly or quarterly basis or once a year. Give yourself a bunch a time to really enjoy the sacred process.

So, I'm hearing the oracle cards calling in the energy. This month in particular we're journeying all month with the romance angels, another Doreen Virtue oracle cards deck. Thank you for your donations. Always welcome to receiving more. So, angels, what do we need to know right now about restful productivity as our daily PRP? Calling in your soulmate. Calling in your soulmate. Your prayers, affirmations, and visualizations help bring you together. This is where we're going to leave off for the week.

The reason why calling in your soulmate is coming up, is because when we clear our energy, when we clear all of that rage and inflammatory thoughts and feelings, when we release our emotions, we create the space to receive our divine partnerships. First with ourselves! Remember, all of this is really about your relationship with you. But, also, for those around us we're more receptive to their love and their support, whether it's in personal or professional relationships.

So, calling in a partner who's able to meet those needs that you discovered weren't being met yet, starting with you being that partner for you. Comment below, send me an email back. What comes up for you around that?

Are you going to do some productive rest time?

Let me know how that goes. Make sure you subscribe on YouTube so that you get your love letters first every week, and we'll see you next time. Bye!

(Original post 02/19/2018)

VictoriaWhitfield.com

Facebook.com/SenseiVictoriaWhitfield

Just for Today...

Book a minimum 5-hour block of time in your schedule to do the 4-step restful productivity process.

Get a hotel room or book a spa visit by yourself or with a trusted confidant to fully embrace the process.

Notice how you feel at that moment - you're already healing!

SHARE THIS! You’d be surprised how many people you know right now are in desperate need of healing and could use this information to change their life. If you can read this, you know someone who needs this Love Letter!

Want spiritual support on your healing journey but don't know where to start? Let's work #together!

Click the pink button below to take your Abundance Energy Jumpstart Assessment with Victoria and jumpstart your healing journey, today!

The post Love Letters | Restful Productivity – Part 3 of 4 appeared first on Sensei Victoria Whitfield.

Feeling cranky lately?

Frustrated that you’re always on the go and never seem to feel “rested”?

Find yourself daydreaming about sleeping in, quitting your job or even running away?

Sounds like you’re exhausted from working too hard!

And not just at work, but also at home, too...

Watch this week’s 9-minute Love Letter video, the first of our 4-week series, on why it’s time for you to start valuing you “PRP’s” on a daily basis so you can get out of your rut.

"It would be lazy for me to take time for play and rest every day."

This is the first of a four-week installment, a brand-new four-week installment on your PRPs. You down with PRP? Yeah you know me. So good. So, this month and for the next four weeks, whenever you are watching this, we're going to be talking about getting you in-tune with your PRPs.

And this week we're going to talk about why you need to make time for your daily PRPs. And what does PRP stand for? Play, rest, and pleasure. These are three essential minerals in every healthy entrepreneurial little, in every healthy person's life, on a day-to-day basis.

You have gotta get play, rest, and pleasure in your daily life. Now, strategically of course we're going to expand that out on a weekly, monthly, quarterly, and yearly basis, right? In increasing doses. But on a daily basis we want to make sure that we create space for your holistic health, with play, rest, and pleasure.

Why is this important to have daily space for play, rest, and pleasure? Isn't that irresponsible? Isn't that lazy? Isn't that .... What are the? You send me an email back, or a comment below. Tell me what are your inner monkeys saying as to why you can't have your daily PRP time.

Now, this is not to say that your entire day, every single day is going to be devoted to getting your three essential nutrients, but most certainly on a daily basis we are going to strategically create time and space. Starting now, and for the next four weeks, shall we? Okay.

So, the reason why your daily PRPs become so important, is because this is your fuel. This fuels you emotionally, mentally, and spiritually. We're going to be covering that over the next four weeks, but this why. Your PRPs as essential nutrients to your holistic health power you. You know life is a marathon. Living your purpose and pursuing your passions is a marathon experience.

Now, for most creative types we may think, "All right I'm going to ... at the last minute put everything together." Right? You push the clock, or procrastinate, put things off, and until after the fact or until the 11th hour then maybe I might rest. There's the phrase, "I'll sleep when I'm dead." Well, you know what? If you live that way, you will be getting to sleep faster than you think. Right?

Burn-out is very real, and it doesn't ever have to be an experience of yours, but if it has, this month in particular, and starting this week in particular. We are going to shut that down.

This is a writer downer. "Burn out may have happened in my past, but it will not happen in my future." #PRP

‪Know this: ‪“#Burnout May have happened in my past, but I will NOT have one in the future.”

Let's do this. So, that's why it's to pro-actively fill your cup on a mental, emotional, and spiritual level. Progressively over time, so that you have creative juices, so that you have the energy to pursue your passions, so that you feel healthy and have a sense of fulfillment in life. You don't have to wait until you're old and retired and can't enjoy life, in order to engage and prioritize your PRPs.

With that being said, the oracle cards for the month are calling. And that is the romance angels oracle cards deck. Oh how romantic. So, we're going to be journeying with this deck all month, over the next four weeks, whenever you're watching this. One of many decks.

You can always hit the contact page on victoriawhitfield.com to find my mailing address. Always receiving donations if you want, or gifts if you'd love to gift me a deck. Yeah. Okay.

Angels what do we need to know right now about why it's so important to work PRPs into our regular diet? This is so powerful. Religious factors. Let's get to it. Your love life is influenced by your religious upbringing and spiritual past.

Now, by the way this deck talks a lot about relationships and love of course, it's the romance deck. So, for those of you who are single and looking, or single and not looking, remember this is a relationship with yourself, right your inner being. And for those who are in a relationship, remember that this is about your relationship with yourself, and your inner being, as well as your partners or those we are working with.

Religious factors, your love life is influenced by your religious upbringing and spiritual path. This is where we're going to bring it to at close for the week.

You know, you may have been brought up in a religious, or philosophical, or social system that told you to put others first, to essentially give up your needs, right, to the service of others, right. To give up the pleasures in life, that living in denial of your own sense of play, rest, and pleasure, is holy, or honorable, or like, "Oh you sacrificed for us." Just like this person or these people sacrificed in these stories, according to that religious, or philosophical, or social system that you've been brought up, or psychological system that you've been brought up in, or adopted over time.

With love, I am not saying that you need to like throw that out of the window, that is at your discretion, that's your relationship between you and God, or you and source, or you and your higher self, your inner self. Right? And I would strongly advise you this week in particular to evaluate how your beliefs about your PRPs on a daily basis, play, rest, and pleasure are effecting your health. Is it serving you or hindering you?

Type in the comments below. Send me an email back what's coming up for you. Make sure that you subscribe on YouTube so that you get your love letters first, ever week.

I'm looking forward to your responses. Are you read for a deep dive into play, rest, and pleasure? Let's do it. Okay. I'll see you next time. Bye.

(Original post 02/05/2018)

VictoriaWhitfield.com

Facebook.com/SenseiVictoriaWhitfield

Just for Today...

Take stock of what you believe about your daily PRPs, and write it down in your journal.

Then ask yourself: “do these beliefs help me or hinder me in the long run?”

Notice how you feel at that moment - you're already healing!

SHARE THIS! You’d be surprised how many people you know right now are in desperate need of healing and could use this information to change their life. If you can read this, you know someone who needs this Love Letter!

Want spiritual support on your healing journey but don't know where to start? Let's work #together!

Click the pink button below to take your Abundance Energy Jumpstart Assessment with Victoria and jumpstart your healing journey, today! 

The post Love Letters | Your Daily PRP’s – Part 1 of 4 appeared first on Sensei Victoria Whitfield.

Tired of keeping up with the Joneses?

Wish you could just be yourself with people, but are too scared of what they'll think?

Hiding your pain and exhaustion behind your smile more than you'd like to admit?

Popular culture and educational systems teach us that it's our level of performance that determines our worth.

Unfortunately, living a life of high-performance doesn't lead to self-acceptance and fulfillment; instead, quite the opposite happens.

Watch this week's 10-minute Love Letter video to explore why we overperform so much, and how you can start to break free from this vicious cycle!

"I am so drained. I feel like everything is falling apart."

This week, Source has got two words for you.

Stop performing. Stop it. This is not a performance. You're not putting on a show. Your life is meant to be lived authentically, okay?

Let's get into this. When we are performing, we feel like we're pushing to get others' approval, or pushing to be productive, or pushing to get recognition, or pushing to be accepted, or we're trying to be good, or we're trying to be healthy, or we're trying to make everyone feel comfortable. There's this sense of artifice, and energy that's expounded, and really shoved out of us, this performance. It's go time.

Performance is really meant for spurts. It's not meant to be a lifestyle. 

I'm telling you, who's watching right now, you've created a lifestyle of performing:

• You perform for your kids, as mother.
• You perform for your clients.
• You perform for your boss, as star employee.
• You perform for your parents as the perfect son.
• You perform for your community as the perfect person, or the best, the go-to guy.
• As grandma, you're just always there, filling this role that either you've created for yourself, that you have to live up to, or it's been placed upon you.

Oh, you're really good at this. Let's put you on this pedestal, so that you have to always operate at that level.

I'm vibing very specific with you right now. I feel it very strongly, of how tired you are performing, performing, performing, trying to be someone that at the end of the day, you're just drained, pushing at that level, or really trying to make something work that is falling apart.

Maybe you're trying to make it work, and you're the only one trying to make it work, and putting on a happy face for others, so that no one knows all of the pain that is behind that performance mask, that has become your face.

There's so much more for you. Beaming love and acceptance at you. And this week in particular, we have to accept who we are, is what Source is saying, specifically by stopping the performance.

Know this: Worry will die when you increase your faith. Go for it this week and trust yourself! @SenseiWhitfield

Performance is over. Curtain call. Yay. Everyone's clapping. Okay, you're done. What happens?

I'm starting to hear the oracle cards calling in the energy about who are you when you're not performing?

This is a journaling. This is a conversation having kind of topic. This is not one specific, one love letter, and you're going to figure this one all out. No.

This is a journey in and of itself, finding out, who are you when you're not performing, into the role, or the mask, right, that you've created for yourself, or that you've inherited.

The Oracle Cards that want to weigh on this, so who are you when you're not performing is the life purpose oracle cards deck by Doreen Virtue.

Can you even imagine? Angels, help us imagine, who are we when we stop performing, and really start stepping into being authentic?

Maybe at work, maybe even in our homes, and our private lives, who are we? Hmm.

School. The answer that you're seeking involves going to school, and this is where we're going to leave off this week in particular.

This is about learning more about yourself, so perhaps you are currently in school right now, or you've been to school in the past, you've studied before, majored in a certain area, or have had certifications in a certain area.

Look to what inspires you the most in your self education. At school, there are certain subjects that you vibrate with the most.

If you're currently in school, maybe art class is something that really just flows out of you. You don't have to perform when you're drawing. You're just in the moment, or writing, or theater, or perhaps in debate, you're just flowing. You don't even have to perform. It's just part of you. You love that intellectual stimulation, right, of debate, or history.

If you are not currently in school, what have you been looking at going back to school for recently?

What would you study simply for the love of it, where you know that at 3AM, if you had to do a project for that specific field of study, you'd be over the moon. "Oh, my gosh. I would love to be up at 3AM writing about this, or studying and practicing for this."

The guides are pushing you towards education to really help you see, who are you when you're not performing?

It's a bit ironic, because we tend to associate school with performance, right? If you get an A, then you're acceptable. A does not mean acceptable. Wrong, so if that's what's coming up for you, by the way, if you're watching, let that one go.

Instead, what would you study simply for the love of it, if there was no grade, if you were just in school for the love of it?

For me, it's meditation and Reiki, world religions, parapsychology, metaphysics, manifestation, and all of that yummy, juice, vortex-y goodness. Right? That's who I am when I'm not performing, and I happen to have integrated that personally into my work. What is it for you? Look to your education.

Post below in the comments. Let me know, what do you find out? What would you study for the love of it? What are you doing in your free time, and studying in your free time, Googling constantly about? That might be a clue as to who you are when you're not performing. I'm here for you.

Contact me if you want to set up a session, so that we can clarify that. I do hour long sessions, as well as half hour sessions on a regular basis, because having regular accountability makes all the difference, okay?

Make sure that you subscribe on YouTube, so that you get your love letters first every week, and we will see you next time!

In Love and Light,

Victoria.

VictoriaWhitfield.com
Facebook.com/SenseiVictoriaWhitfield

Just for Today...

Make time to get clarity: journal about what you do simply for the love and pleasure of it, especially listing things that no one knows.

Then write down how it feels when you're doing these things, versus when you feel like you're performing or trying to appease others.

SHARE THIS! You’d be surprised how many people you know right now are in desperate need of healing and could use this information to change their life. If you can read this, you know someone who needs this Love Letter!

Want spiritual support on your healing journey but don't know where to start? Tell me!

Click the grey button below to book your complimentary 30-minute Share Your Story Call  to start your healing journey, today!

The post Love Letters | Stop Performing appeared first on Sensei Victoria Whitfield.

Are you constantly comparing yourself to others, only to find yourself coming up short?

Frustrated that you're not healing as fast as other people do? 

Think that there's something wrong with you because your manifestation is taking longer than expected?

Some people can make it look like they have it all together.

If you're not careful, you'll find yourself more concerned with their lives than your own.

Watch this week's 8-minute Love Letter video to take your power back by defining what YOUR peaceful life looks like!

"I don't know how to relax."

This week in particular source wants you to define your peace. Define your peace.

What this is about is getting really clear on exactly what is your version of feeling peaceful, feeling at ease, feeling grounded, feeling healthy and feeling stress free.

It's up to you to clearly define it. Let's get into that.

When it's time for us to define our terms it's really about setting a foundation for our mindset. That's the purpose of defining things in the first place. This is really a mindset shift, that source, that God is calling you to this week in particular.

My guides are saying the reason why Source is saying this is that you have been going according to someone else's, or something else's, protocol of what should make you relax.

Perhaps slowing down and meditating and laying out according to someone else's program or protocol or expectations has been what you've been going by.

• • "I need to relax."

• • "I'm going to sign up for this program."

• "I'm going to do X amount of yoga classes and that should make me peaceful or at ease."

There's one version, or you get it from your parents or your social circle or the media. Or even our own home grown expectations on ourself that we push - "this should calm me down", or "I don't know how to relax." That's another option.

Your own version of peace is going to be unique to you.

This week in particular it's time for you to uncover and discover that for yourself.

This is about journaling, yes, but it's also more over, I'm hearing the guides saying, tracking and monitoring yourself.

Perhaps you've been on a trip to the nutritionist or dietitian and they're saying that you need to change your diet. One of the first things that they'll do is say, "Keep a food diary so that we have an idea, let's say 4 or 5 days or 7 days, what do you put into you and how that effects you. How do you feel?"

In this instance, this week in particular, source is saying, "Track what you are putting into you that creates or is suppose to create your peaceful grounded state."

How many things do you do for yourself, for your self care? Are you doing them regularly or irregularly? Do some things need to be increased because they have an excellent effect? Do some things need to be decreased because they sound good on paper, they look good on the outside but they're not really having the effect that you need the most from that self care practice.

Kick boxing isn't for everybody. Walks outside aren't necessarily for everybody. Maybe your walks need to be on a standing treadmill desk so that you can be typing while you walk. Hours and hours of video games is not for everybody, or maybe doing it, some of you out there watching, might be watching hours and hours of TV or hours and hours of video games, or Candy Crush, on the iPad or the iPhone, your Android, and it's a little bit of calming but it's poof, gone as soon your finished.

Track what are you doing for self care and to manage how you feel, to manage your boredom, to manage your anger, to manage your fatigue, to manage your frustration, sadness and stress.

Watch what you do over this week in particular so that you can clearly define what's working and what's not working.

Now the guides are saying, "pull the oracle card, Victoria". Healing with the fairies is what's coming through in the energy of who wants to help weigh in on this topic.

Fairies, what do we need to know right now about defining our peace? Is there anything else that we need to know? This is beautiful.

Honoring your true feelings.

This is where we'll leave off for the week.

The way to honor yourself and become more self aware is by observing yourself. This is a self observation week.

You can't really improve your self care if you have no idea what your one, doing, if anything, and two, what's the direct effect on you?

As you look at what you're doing you've got to be honest with yourself and say, "You know what? I really don't like that yoga class," or, "You know what? I'm seeing my therapist. I really don't like him. We're not going anywhere." If you're in business, "I'm in this networking group," or "I'm with this coach or I have this client, this isn't serving me."

"This is taking away from my peace rather then adding to it." You've got to tune into what your true feelings are in order to know whether or not it serves you in the first place.

I totally am so grateful for the fairies to point that out. It's about finding your center.

Send me an email back, comment below, make sure that you subscribe on YouTube so that you get your love letters first every week, but comment back. What's coming up for you?

What did you start tracking and realize:

• • "Oh my gosh I need to do more of this?"

• • "I meditated and I had a whole different day that I thought I would by meditating for five minutes in the morning."

• "I should do more of that."

Send me that. I want to hear about it. I'm sending you so much love.

I believe in you. You can do this. Take your time and do it right.

I'll see you next week. Bye.

Know this: What makes you feel at peace is entirely unique to you. #selfcare #bk2ys @SenseiWhitfield

In Love and Light,

Victoria.

VictoriaWhitfield.com
Facebook.com/SenseiVictoriaWhitfield

Just for Today...

Track what you do to create your sense of peacefulness.

Write down in a journal the habits and activities you regularly do to self-soothe, and mark how long their effects last on you.

Notice how you feel at that moment - you're already healing!

SHARE THIS! You’d be surprised how many people you know right now are in desperate need of healing and could use this information to change their life. If you can read this, you know someone who needs this Love Letter!

Want spiritual support on your healing journey but don't know where to start? Tell me!

Give us a call at +1 (732) 903-8573 or click on the blue BOOK NOW button to start your healing journey, today!

The post Love Letters | Define Your Peace appeared first on Sensei Victoria Whitfield.

Tired of keeping up with the Joneses?

Wish you could just be yourself with people, but are too scared of what they'll think?

Hiding your pain and exhaustion behind your smile more than you'd like to admit?

Popular culture and educational systems teach us that it's our level of performance that determines our worth.

Unfortunately, living a life of high-performance doesn't lead to self-acceptance and fulfillment; instead, quite the opposite happens.

Watch this week's 10-minute Love Letter video to explore why we overperform so much, and how you can start to break free from this vicious cycle!

"I am so drained. I feel like everything is falling apart."

This week, Source has got two words for you.

Stop performing. Stop it. This is not a performance. You're not putting on a show. Your life is meant to be lived authentically, okay?

Let's get into this. When we are performing, we feel like we're pushing to get others' approval, or pushing to be productive, or pushing to get recognition, or pushing to be accepted, or we're trying to be good, or we're trying to be healthy, or we're trying to make everyone feel comfortable. There's this sense of artifice, and energy that's expounded, and really shoved out of us, this performance. It's go time.

Performance is really meant for spurts. It's not meant to be a lifestyle. 

I'm telling you, who's watching right now, you've created a lifestyle of performing:

• • You perform for your kids, as mother.

• • You perform for your clients.

• • You perform for your boss, as star employee.

• • You perform for your parents as the perfect son.

• • You perform for your community as the perfect person, or the best, the go-to guy.

• As grandma, you're just always there, filling this role that either you've created for yourself, that you have to live up to, or it's been placed upon you.

Oh, you're really good at this. Let's put you on this pedestal, so that you have to always operate at that level.

I'm vibing very specific with you right now. I feel it very strongly, of how tired you are performing, performing, performing, trying to be someone that at the end of the day, you're just drained, pushing at that level, or really trying to make something work that is falling apart.

Maybe you're trying to make it work, and you're the only one trying to make it work, and putting on a happy face for others, so that no one knows all of the pain that is behind that performance mask, that has become your face.

There's so much more for you. Beaming love and acceptance at you. And this week in particular, we have to accept who we are, is what Source is saying, specifically by stopping the performance.

Know this: Know this: Self-acceptance starts where performing ends. #loveyourself @SenseiWhitfield http://bit.ly/295Gf4K

Performance is over. Curtain call. Yay. Everyone's clapping. Okay, you're done. What happens?

I'm starting to hear the oracle cards calling in the energy about who are you when you're not performing?

This is a journaling. This is a conversation having kind of topic. This is not one specific, one love letter, and you're going to figure this one all out. No.

This is a journey in and of itself, finding out, who are you when you're not performing, into the role, or the mask, right, that you've created for yourself, or that you've inherited.

The Oracle Cards that want to weigh on this, so who are you when you're not performing is the life purpose oracle cards deck by Doreen Virtue.

Can you even imagine? Angels, help us imagine, who are we when we stop performing, and really start stepping into being authentic?

Maybe at work, maybe even in our homes, and our private lives, who are we? Hmm.

School. The answer that you're seeking involves going to school, and this is where we're going to leave off this week in particular.

This is about learning more about yourself, so perhaps you are currently in school right now, or you've been to school in the past, you've studied before, majored in a certain area, or have had certifications in a certain area.

Look to what inspires you the most in your self education. At school, there are certain subjects that you vibrate with the most.

If you're currently in school, maybe art class is something that really just flows out of you. You don't have to perform when you're drawing. You're just in the moment, or writing, or theater, or perhaps in debate, you're just flowing. You don't even have to perform. It's just part of you. You love that intellectual stimulation, right, of debate, or history.

If you are not currently in school, what have you been looking at going back to school for recently?

What would you study simply for the love of it, where you know that at 3AM, if you had to do a project for that specific field of study, you'd be over the moon. "Oh, my gosh. I would love to be up at 3AM writing about this, or studying and practicing for this."

The guides are pushing you towards education to really help you see, who are you when you're not performing?

It's a bit ironic, because we tend to associate school with performance, right? If you get an A, then you're acceptable. A does not mean acceptable. Wrong, so if that's what's coming up for you, by the way, if you're watching, let that one go.

Instead, what would you study simply for the love of it, if there was no grade, if you were just in school for the love of it?

For me, it's meditation and Reiki, world religions, parapsychology, metaphysics, manifestation, and all of that yummy, juice, vortex-y goodness. Right? That's who I am when I'm not performing, and I happen to have integrated that personally into my work. What is it for you? Look to your education.

Post below in the comments. Let me know, what do you find out? What would you study for the love of it? What are you doing in your free time, and studying in your free time, Googling constantly about? That might be a clue as to who you are when you're not performing. I'm here for you.

Contact me if you want to set up a session, so that we can clarify that. I do hour long sessions, as well as half hour sessions on a regular basis, because having regular accountability makes all the difference, okay?

Make sure that you subscribe on YouTube, so that you get your love letters first every week, and we will see you next time!

In Love and Light,

Victoria.

VictoriaWhitfield.com
Facebook.com/SenseiVictoriaWhitfield

Just for Today...

Make time to get clarity: journal about what you do simply for the love and pleasure of it, especially listing things that no one knows.

Then write down how it feels when you're doing these things, versus when you feel like you're performing or trying to appease others.

Notice how you feel at that moment - you're already healing!

SHARE THIS! You’d be surprised how many people you know right now are in desperate need of healing and could use this information to change their life. If you can read this, you know someone who needs this Love Letter!

Want spiritual support on your healing journey but don't know where to start? Tell me!

Give us a call at +1 (732) 903-8573 or click on the blue BOOK NOW button to start your healing journey, today!

The post Love Letters | Stop Performing appeared first on Sensei Victoria Whitfield.

Curious about crystal healing?

Love trying new holistic therapies?

Trouble focusing during meditation?

Crystal therapy is a powerful tool for keeping you focused and disciplined, believe it or not!

Our gem friends are natural tools for rebalancing your health on a vibrational, energetic level.

Watch this week's 9-minute Love Letter video to learn how to start doing crystal meditation for yourself!

"How do I meditate with a crystal?"

This week, in particular, Source is asking that you get started meditating with crystals.

What do I mean by crystals?

There are, of course, lead crystals like the Swarovski crystals and things that are shiny, and pretty. Wonderful to look at.

But the crystals that I'm talking about, and the crystals Source is talking about, are minerals. Mineral specimens that could be tumbled, or ruff cut, or even particularly shaped.

We have few different crystal specimens here at the dojo, so I want to explain to you why crystals are awesome.

First off, they are libraries of healing information.

Picture this.

There's a philosophy called stone tape theory, which basically states that all stones are record keepers. They are constantly keeping record of all the energy that they have been exposed to.

Stone tape theory, therefore, explains paranormal experiences, like if you've ever been in a house where at a certain time of the day you start smelling a certain perfume, or cigar smoke, or footsteps start happening repeatedly.

It's because the natural energy of the house has recorded the emotional and physical life energy that has occurred there.

All stones, in particular, are capable of doing this, but they also have healing knowledge.

They're basically the natural computers of the earth.

If you have a crystal skull, for example, they are the natural internet. (I mean, if you want to take a deep dive on Google go ahead. Crystal skulls, meditation, enjoy.)

Two in particular here at the dojo, two of our crystal friends here wanted to come forward to talk to you.

This is rose quartz. His name is Pepe. He was a gift, and he's been charging for quite sometime here. Rose quartz. This is a wonderful example of a ruff cut barrel that you could meditate with.

Or down here is Jeff. Now how do my crystals have names? I just ask them and they tell me.

Pepe and Jeff here wanted to illustrate to you with me how to meditate with a crystal.

You can simply have one in your purse, or display one on your table, or your desk at work, or your bed side table, etc., to bring more healing energy.

Every stone has meaning.

By the way, this is rose quartz, which is good for the heart. In healing your heart, your inner child, feeling safe.

Jeff here, is fluorite in particular. What he works with is clarity, mental clarity, being organized, disciplined, focused, systems, creating systems, and really staying on your game on a regular basis. He's all about consistency.

I'm going to hold Jeff in particular. Peppy is down here sending you lots of love.

When you are meditating with a crystal, what you want to do is:

• • You hold your crystal in your hands 

• • You imagine that the energy of that crystal is flowing up your arms. Cycling through with your breath.

• Feeling that energy go through you, and exhaling going back into the stone creating a circuit of energy is one way to meditate with your crystal.

Another way, and I'm going to use Peppy for this illustration, is to look at all of the facets in great detail.

Really allowing your eye to go into all of the different quarks, nooks, and crannies. Perhaps rubbing your finger as well. Your thumb over the ridges activates more of the healing information.

Now all of this is to say that spending time with your crystals helps their healing information attune to your aura.

Your aura and their energy begin to talk to each other and harmonize. We are all, all living beings are harmonic.

The same way if you're singing in a choir, it's best to be in tune. Nature does that naturally. She creates harmony. Bring some crystals into your life. Crystal people such as Jeff and Pepe.

I'm hearing the oracle cards for the week.

It's the Crystal Oracle. Another gift deck. Thank you for your support. 

What do we need to know right now? I'm hearing this card.

Jeff is right here, and look what card came out. Fluorite.

You can't make this stuff up. Wow. Thanks Jeff. I think you really want to get through to people. How crazy. You know that's normal here. Get out.

All right. They're telling me to read, in particular:

Concentration, psychic protection, and emotional stability. Fluorite emanates a highly spiritual vibration that can shield you from a negative influence, or a negative person that is causing you to be emotionally imbalanced. Knowing that you are being surrounded by love and light and trust in the protection you are now receiving. Let go of your fears and concerns, and allow this wondrous healing to occur. Start to focus on the things that bring joy to your life. Focus on all you would love to be doing rather than worrying about what others think. You are safe and eternally loved. Nothing can harm you except for your own fears. Trust!

Here's where we'll leave off. It's time to bring in some crystal energy to really help anchor your aura, and make you feel more safe and grounded as you continue forward.

Know this: #Crystal energy will help #anchor your #aura and make you feel more #safe and #grounded. @SenseiWhitfield

They come from the earth, so bringing more earth energy can really help you.

Send me an email back. Comment below. Let me know what's coming up for you. If you're curious about crystals.

By the way, size does not matter. Relax. Pepe is just as awesome as Jeff. Don't feel like I got to get a gigantic one.

What matters most is how you feel when you're with your crystal.

Bring more earth energy so that you can feel more grounded and protected this week in particular.

Send me pictures. I want to see your crystals, okay?

Sending you so much love. We all are, and get ready.

In Love and Light,

Victoria.

VictoriaWhitfield.com
Facebook.com/SenseiVictoriaWhitfield

Just for Today...

Do a 3-5 minute crystal meditation to raise your personal vibration.

Want to spiritual support on your healing journey but don't know where to start? Tell me!

Give me a call at +1 (732) 903-8573 or click on the blue BOOK NOW button to start your healing journey, today!

The post Love Letters | Crystal Meditation appeared first on Sensei Victoria Whitfield.

Tired of being "stuck" in life, waiting for your time to shine?

Feeling frustrated that you, your partner or your business still haven't realized their potential, after all your hard work?

Having a hard time just accepting what's happening and embracing yourself and your life "as is"?

Sometimes our "great expectations" can get the best of us, blinding our eyes to the opportunities and positive aspects in our present moment.

This is a particularly sticky situation, because we're caught up in reaching for something that doesn't exist, and meanwhile in our current reality, we end up feeling blocked and stagnant.

Watch the above 11-minute video to learn exactly how you can start practicing acceptance and get unstuck!

"How can I accept my life completely?"

Acceptance keeps the momentum moving forward.

When we do not accept what the circumstances are, there's a lack of acceptance of what is.

When we do not accept who we are dating or married to as what they're showing is who they actually are, we usually are continuously looking past them, thinking: "maybe one day he's going to be this, or maybe one day she'll do this, or maybe someday this will happen."

If we're embracing being more in alignment with nature, practicing acceptance only becomes that much more important, because acceptance keeps you in the now.  

A good place to start is accepting disappointment; thinking, for example: "Okay, I see that this is what it is. I'm in a job that I do not like. I'm not comfortable with my body. This person that I'm dating really isn't right for me as they are, or this person that I'm married to is totally out of alignment with me, as they are right now."

The next step though, after acceptance, is taking action once you are clear on what you have now.

Getting to the point of accepting what is, and having a sense of peace with that, will lower your blood pressure, will calm aches in your body. Acceptance can change the way that you sleep, the way that you eat, the way that you spend your money, spend your time, who you spend your time with.

When we are in a state of acceptance, we're letting go of the fight to make things more than what they actually are -- you put your sword down, and just say "okay, I'm here."

Believe it or not, spirit is saying that the effect of this is that it wipes the slate clean in life.

Emotionally, energetically, physically, socially, financially. Clean slate.

Now for some of you, I'm feeling a nervousness in the energy around having a totally clean slate. I hear you thinking "Well, what do I do with that?"

If that's you, here's what you do. Raise the vibration of that image. Think of it like a blank check. The clean slate is meant to be infinite possibilities. It's not meant to intimidate you.

Know this: If you can accept where you're at now, that gives you a strong foundation for actually changing things for the better.  

It's about taking responsibility for all of what is your actual reality. What is the totality of your world? You need to be able to answer that before you can be in charge of your world.

Source is saying it is extremely important that you have peace with what Source has given you now.

That you have consciousness and clarity with what you have now. It's okay. All is well.

All right, so I'm hearing the oracle cards calling in the energy. Doreen Virtue's "Indigo Angel Oracle Cards" is the deck that came through that wanted to share about practicing acceptance.

So we're just asking as we shuffle: "Angels of understanding, acceptance and peace, show us what do we need to know right now about practicing acceptance? What's at stake? Why are we being so prideful? Not saying no, this is not acceptable. How can I be more than who I really am right now?"

The Oracle Card that came through is... Acceptance!

LOL! WOWZA! I've been doing this for years, and well, I must say, it never gets old. It never gets old! I think this is pretty self explanatory that we're in the vortex, that your synchronicity is lining up.

Here's the reading:

 

As an indigo, you're built to question everything, as part of your mission for making healthful changes to this planet. However, this characteristic may cause you to reject a part of your life that's necessary, in order for you to get to the next step.

Let me pause for a second and emphasize this: if you want the next level in your life, the next level starts with acceptance. It's good stuff. Let's continue reading:

 

This card is a message for you to search through your life and determine if there is anything, or anyone, you are rejecting.

Accepting your life completely is the best thing you can do for yourself right now. 

While this may not be easy or even seem right, know that you simply cannot change everything you do not like, and certain things must be tolerated in this lifetime.

Why must they be tolerated? I have to pause here, because I'm hearing someone in the Energy ask "why shouldn't I settle for anything?"

Here's the thing: It's not about settling.

You could be rejecting the dark gifts, aka the lessons and stepping stones that Source is sending you in your present total reality in this present moment of existence.

You could be rejecting those gifts that are the launching pads to get you to the next level that you are designed for, if you're not accepting them or tolerating them, working through them, understanding and using them to flow through your life's journey. The reading continues:

 

You could be rejecting something that's really essential to the recipe of "You." Ask the angels to bring you strength and comfort to make letting go and accepting easier.  Acceptance is not easy. However, it is a decision.

All you have to do is decide in the moment I accept that what is, is what is.

This is what I've got right now, and I am accepting it, or this is who you are right now, and I am accepting you just as you are. Good, bad, and whoa Nelly. Right?

You'll notice that when you do that, such as admitting to yourself "I accept that I am really angry right now," things will process faster.

I encounter so many people, especially when I meet them for the first time who say, "Oh yeah, I'm blocked," or "this is blocked," or "I'm feeling blocked in life." Declarations like these show acceptance, and this is a serious issue because they don't realize they're fueling those blocks with their acceptance of the idea of being a victim of being blocked.

Another issue is that when you can't accept what's going on, you're going to be at an impasse.

There's a gift there that Source is trying to send you in this frustrating or seemingly "negative" experience. So deciding to open up and allow the experience to be what it is, not knowing what may come on the other side of being in that state of acceptance, you are opening up to moving forward authentically.

If you're curious to know more about this, send me an email at SenseiVictoriaWhitfield@gmail.com or comment below. I'm really intrigued to hear what are you not accepting.

Is there something that's been eating at you, or really pressing on you, and really fueling your stress level that you feel is absolutely not acceptable? Email me about it!

Someone in the energy just said that if something bad happened to you, the way that you can practice acceptance is to accept the fact that that happened. It's not in your current total reality.

It's in your history, yes, but is it right here? Happening right now? No. This step has to come first before you let anything go, or even think about forgiving.

This is a very intense spiritual practice. Simple, but profound. So be kind to yourself; I'm sending you so much love, and I will see you next week.

In Love and Light,

Victoria.

VictoriaWhitfield.com
Facebook.com/SenseiVictoriaWhitfield

Just for Today...

Observe yourself today to find out what people, places, things or actions your are avoiding, rejecting or running from.

When you find one, ask yourself: "What gift from the Universe could I be refusing to receive by avoiding this situation?"

Notice how you feel at that moment - you're already healing!

SHARE THIS! You’d be surprised how many people you know right now are in desperate need of healing and could use this information to change their life. If you can read this, you know someone who needs this Love Letter!

Want to let go and forgive but don't know where to start? Tell me!

Give me a call at +1 (732) 903-8573 or click on the blue BOOK NOW button to start your healing journey, today!

The post Love Letters | Stress vs. Practicing Acceptance – Part 2 appeared first on Sensei Victoria Whitfield.

Feeling stressed out lately because everything's changing?

Having a hard time forgiving someone who does things different than you?

Can't believe that things are not working out the way you expected?

One of the biggest sources of stress is the inability to practice acceptance of how things are.

More often than not, we unconsciously try to force the world to fit our version of how it "should" be, rather than staying non-judgmental and open.

Watch the above 11-minute video to learn to relax and stop "shoulding" all over yourself!!

"Why can't I look at my life and accept it as it is?"

This week, the topic that's coming through is practicing acceptance.

In the energy, as I was searching for what we were going to deliver for this week's love letter, and the following question came out of our soul: "What are the different sources of stress in our lives that different students of the dojo and I observe, and what does the Energy have to say?"

One of the big sources of stress in our lives is our inability to practice acceptance. The first thing that's coming through to share from the spirit is that, acceptance counteracts, or it goes against, the ego.

Ego and pride are catalysts for stress, obstacles and frustration in life.

The way this happens is that we form a mental identification with A when we are experiencing B.

Even though we believe that we are A and we believe in A, we say we are A or have been raised to be A, the experience however -- the physical sensations, the temporal physical manifestation of whatever spirit is delivering into our lives at this moment -- is B.

We're looking at B and overlaying A, because that's our glasses. We're wearing A glasses and the only thing that we could see through these glasses is A. There's no such thing as B. So we're just going to move B out of the way.

That is what a lack of acceptance looks like, energetically speaking and psychologically as well.

What are the effects of that A-B split, personality wise, perceptually? What are the effects?

• Stress
• Lack of understanding
• Suppressed expression
• Anger
• Feeling ungrounded, out of alignment, depressed, anxious, untrusting, unworthy or invalid.

We're looking at B, which is the actual temporal manifestation, the natural physical spacial manifestation that we're experiencing now is a B experience. But in our minds there's nothing but A in terms of the data that we can interpret of it, cognitively. In other words, there's a mental pattern to rather not a have to interpret the data.

So there's a mental pattern that we follow: all data that comes in must be sifted through the A protocol and fit into an A prototype. This is a bit of robotic description on purpose, the spirits are saying, because it is unnatural.

In fact it is manufactured, this A prototype, this A box; we're trying to fit the circle peg that we're experiencing into a square box. This A prototype or protocol is manufactured. Why?

This is what I'm hearing in the energy: "Well, why would we have it that way, of not being able to look at our lives and just accept them as they are? How did that happen?"

Well of course, there's nature versus nurture.

Humans as an animal that has the gift of critical thinking naturally like to look for patterns, and to duplicate patterns, to create a sense of stability, order, reproductibility, familiarity. It is to create a tribe.

Here’s why this happens: We're searching for ourselves in the patterns in the All That Is that is around us naturally.

We are also nurtured then on top of that: socially, culturally, traditionally through advertising, commercializing, religiously.

All of these different external systems will create their version of what type of paradigm you should be looking at your world through, even if the world that you're experiencing is totally not in alignment with it, totally not.

Let's put all the technical language aside for a second. I'll tell you a story to give an example of a lack of acceptance, what that looks like and the effects:

Johnny is a good boy. Johnny comes from a good family. Johnny gets good grades. Johnny plays good with other kids. Off the street or in sports, Johnny is a good boy.

Johnny goes to a good school. He takes on a good major. He does good and he graduates in a good place in his class.

Johnny gets a good job and Johnny is dating a good girl. Their relationship is going good, so they get married and he has good marriage and everything is good.

What determines the version of Johnny's "good" is completely relative.

As you were visualizing and thinking and going along with that whole story I just told you, what were your versions of what is "good" that were coming up for you?

"I'm making good money. We're having a good marriage. We're going to a good school, getting good grades." But what are your version of good grades?

For some people, their version of good or acceptable is entirely different, beautifully different, entirely different than your idea of what's good. 

What matters most is how you feel.

Know this: If you're judging what a "good life" is based only on someone else's idea of what's good, you're out of alignment.

The frustration and the symptoms of being out of alignment, of being ungrounded, frustrated or non-expressed are going to come out, naturally, because there's a fundamental lack of clarity around what's your definition of what's acceptable and not acceptable.

In previous videos, we were talking about protecting your joy and how one way to do that is to know "what the heck is my joy?"

It's about a defining process. You can do that to the Nth degree and find yourself more by defining yourself than finding yourself in some workshop, some retreat, some book, some person's arms.

You don't go find yourself, you define yourself.

That's what I'm hearing to tell you in the energy. And one way that is really powerful, but very simple, spiritual practice to start this path is by practicing acceptance.

It's very simple: "whatever it is, is what it is."

At first glance, I'm going to sound profoundly pedestrian, but I would challenge you to look a little bit deeper into that phrase, especially if you are not satisfied with your job, with your relationship or partner, with your body, with your finances, with your studies, with the food that you're eating, the place the you live, et cetera.

If you are feeling not satisfied, you need to look into embracing a sense of acceptance, but not to settle.

That is not acceptance. That's reticence. Huge difference, go to thesaurus.com if you don't know what reticence is. But the only thing I'm going to tell you is that one is active and the other is passive.

Check back next week for part 2 of this love letter!

In Love and Light,

Victoria.

VictoriaWhitfield.com
Facebook.com/SenseiVictoriaWhitfield

Just for Today...

When you start feeling frustrated with someone who is not doing a "good" job according to your standards, pause and remember that what is "good" or "acceptable" performance is relative to each person.

Take a moment to lovingly go over YOUR standards with that person, assuming they genuinely didn't know.

Notice how you feel at that moment - you're already healing!

SHARE THIS! You’d be surprised how many people you know right now are in desperate need of healing and could use this information to change their life. If you can read this, you know someone who needs this Love Letter!

Want to de-stress and clear your energy but don't know where to start? Tell me!

Give me a call at +1 (732) 903-8573 or click on the blue BOOK NOW button to start your healing journey, today!

The post Love Letters | Stress vs. Practicing Acceptance – Part 1 appeared first on Sensei Victoria Whitfield.

Are you having a hard time recognizing, respecting and communicating your own personal boundaries to others?

Wondering why you always end up being the only one giving or trying to make things work in relationships?

Disappointed that your partner or coworkers never pick up the slack when you need them to?

Spirit wants you to know that there has to be a clear line in the sand for you between what you're willing to put up with in life and what you want.

The energy this week wants to discuss why we let ourselves -- as well as the people in our lives -- get away with highway robbery overstepping boundaries.

Watch the above 16-minute video to make sure the something that’s got to give isn’t your sense of personal wellbeing!

"But if I don't do anything, nothing gets done..."

Why do we allow ourselves to feel day after day drained, exhausted, unfulfilled, sad, frustrated, anxious, and holding repressed anger?

Source is saying that something's got to give if we keep this up because the universe is in a constant state of motion.

What does that mean? The way that nature works is that she's in constant growth and decomposition.

There's this constant cycle of expansion through shedding the old layers; just watch how a tree grows if you want to see it. NASA even reported that they recently confirmed that the universe is expanding—just like you. Why? Because that is nature. How does that apply?

Here it is: In any given situation in life, if you don't give in, something else will or if something else won't give in, you have to. Something has got to give, always.

This applies specifically to boundaries: how you lay out your boundaries, or standards rather, in life. Not only how you lay them out, but also whether or not you truly honor them in the way that you interact with people.

Be kind to yourself if you're the someone that's usually giving, rather than allowing the circumstance or the other players involved to be the someone or something that has got to give to you.

What does that look like? Well let me gender this for a moment, and talk to the ladies.

Oftentimes women will give wonderful, colorful excuses.

Excuse after excuse about why they shouldn't express what they're really thinking because they’ll say to themselves “oh I'm going to get in trouble,” “oh someone is going to get angry,” “oh I'm going to get fired” or “oh they're going to leave me,” right?

There's millions of excuses to maintain this status of silence.

But, the truth is excuses are an avoidant protective measure designed to create an artificial sense of control over where we're at, emotionally and energetically speaking. 

Rather than staying open and expressing whatever needs to be expressed for whatever reason, we tell ourselves it doesn't matter.

However, what really matters most is how you're feeling in that moment.

Here’s why: if you're maintaining the silence for fear, the effects of this show up elsewhere, because something’s got to resolve or give in to confirming your sense of fear.

If we're holding that (false) sense of “safe silence,” the thing that's going to give is usually your sense of emotional support, bodily health, personal safety, relational health, financial health, right?

If we're not able to stay open, there will be things in your environment that will reflect your lack of openness.

Something has got to give. If you won't allow that authentic energy you’re feeling to flow through you, which is Source energy and the energy of honesty and truth, it's going to come out in a different way.

With women oftentimes our weight will reflect the inability to express our emotions, depending on the woman.

Whether it is not being able to hold on weight, so having eating disorders, or having excessive weight that just won't go away. If you don't give in, something else will.

Coping mechanisms are meant to psychologically block against that feeling of not being open, better known as a feeling of vulnerability, but blocking this feeling can have detrimental effects.

In fact, there's a universal law that applies here. The Universal Law of Causation: for every cause, there is an effect. Something always has to give; things don’t happen in a vacuum, all energy is responsive.

On the other side of the fence, I've seen men who are holding on to a past disappointment of guilt of failure and it will reflect in their bodies.

Hip tightness or a consistent tightness around the shoulders—this sense of restriction is the manifestation of guilt and disappointment that they're not able to let go of.

Why do men hold on? Often for pride, for honor... which is just pride. Telling ourselves “I was wrong and I should be punished,” so there is a series of punishments that come down to resolve this in life, indefinitely.

Unforgiveness and not being able to let go of the past can also have financial repercussions, believe it or not.

Know this: Not being able to let go of the past is a desire to not confront raw feelings within ourselves; & this can affect your #finances!

That avoidant behavior can show up in your finances in the form of other self-sabotaging behaviors: ignorance, impulsivity, mismanagement and lack mentality.

Think of it this way. If I can't confront that painful issue in the past, then I darn well can't look at what's going on my bank account or have a sense of personal mastery about that now! Be kind to yourself if that's you.

Something always has to give. You don't have to be the one that's incurring the repercussions of that fear, though.

You can give yourself permission to be free of always being The Giver, or the one who has to shrink, or bear the brunt of the pain, frustration, the effects.

Yes, you can choose to allow others to assume the responsibility for their actions.

So many times the most spiritual, sensitive people absorb the effects of others, because we want to protect them, love them, or because we’re so empathic that we can’t help ourselves.

You know, the psychological term for that is “enabling,” right?

We'll absorb the effects of others' behaviors because we think we're being responsible, doing our best.

We're trying here at Share Prices Australia to make sure everybody else feels comfortable, at the expense of our own physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual health. Financial as well.

We'll just take it in because be think proudly “I can take it. You don't have to. You don't have to.”

It's a mistake to think that this is courageous. Instead you're just being a martyr.

We're not respecting the fact that we all have thresholds, telling ourselves over and over “I'm going to ignore this, I'm going to ignore my feelings. I'm going to ignore my dreams. I'm going to ignore my own energy for as long as I possibly can so I can push through to look...normal.”

You're doing a lot more harm than you think because it's going against Nature. In terms of our Nature, she is never static, she’s always flowing—something's got to give.

It may appear that you're holding back negativity from others but in actuality you’re inviting it in to your energy, and then only hiding from yourself.

Watch the video for this week’s oracle card, which shows you how to stop sabotaging your natural flow of wellbeing and abundance, by stopping this behavior pattern before you burnout!

In Love and Light,

Victoria.

VictoriaWhitfield.com
Facebook.com/SenseiVictoriaWhitfield

Just for Today...

Notice how you're enabling someone’s negative behavior or treatment of you by staying silent.

When you notice your silence as YOUR PART in enabling the situation, ask yourself “What could I have done to stop feeding that situation?”

Notice how you feel at that moment - you're already healing!

SHARE THIS! You’d be surprised how many people you know right now are in desperate need of healing and could use this information to change their life. If you can read this, you know someone who needs this Love Letter!

Want to protect your energy but don't know where to start? Tell me!

Give me a call at +1 (732) 903-8573 or click on the blue BOOK NOW button to start your healing journey, today!

The post Love Letters | Something’s Got to Give appeared first on Sensei Victoria Whitfield.