Dear Love,

We stand at the precipice of the dawn of a new era in your life this week. 

​​With the Winter Solstice occurring this Thursday being the shortest day and the longest night of the year, it signals a time of rebirth. Your rebirth.

It is time for you to let go of the year behind you; to let go of the projects, the people, the dreams and relationships that are unrealized, unfinished, and unsalvageable.

Clear your cache. Empty your emotional and financial Trash bin.

What have you pushed back on to the backburner, indefinitely?
What have you hung up to slowly fade in to the background and be eaten away by the moths of mental abandonment and forgetfulness?

My spirit guides say there are things hanging in your energy like cobwebs - unfinished or unresolved initiatives​​​​​​​​​, conversations and promises - that are sneakily draining your energy in the background, similarly how leaving a ton of apps open on your device eats up its battery life.

But this week, we need to look at why you left these issues unresolved; and my guides say, it's to avoid dealing with the feeling of Disappointment.​​

Let's talk about it...

I explore this in detail in this week's video: CLICK TO WATCH on YouTube.

"Disappointment is hot lava; avoid it at all costs," chants the inner Perfectionist.

"And while you're at it, don't give in to any negative feelings at all. That's not allowed. You can't be wrong. Nope. You can't be negative. Nope. That's not allowed. No anger, no resentment, no frustration, no dissatisfaction, no betrayal, no confusion, no grief, no shame, no jealousy, no regret, no nothing..."​​

She continues, clenching her controller claws around your mind: "Must be positive. Must keep it together​​. Must put on a happy face. Must look successful. Must be fine. Must not let on. Must hide. Must keep going. Must keep up. Must power through it. Must not set off any alarms. Must be strong. Must not be weak. Must stay on top of things. Must..."

​​Denying your negative feelings is not dealing with them.
​
In fact, it makes them worse, because when you deny admitting how you really feel, you drive the negative energy of your negative feelings deeper into your body and psyche, and this breeds disease and dysfunction.

Denying is lying.​​​
​
To yourself, and to others.​

Still holding on to something - a person, project or plan - that is dead and gone?
Can't seem to let it go and move on to manifesting your next big thing?

If so, let me help you get the clarity you need to move forward:
CLICK TO BOOK A CLARITY CALL WITH VICTORIA NOW

Deep ​breath in... and exhale.

When we can't let go, when we can't admit​​ defeat, when we can't admit we were wrong, when we can't admit we aren't happy, when we can't admit we're angry, when we can't admit we are disappointed...we deny ourselves the right to Humanity.

The inner Perfectionist, the inner Controller - she is doing her best to protect you from how bad negative feelings feel. However, she is part of your Traumatized Mind. She is not part of your Healthy Mind.​​

Mistakenly, her version of protecting you from "bad things" is based in restricting your access to, and even erasing altogether, your authentic feelings​​ that lie outside the range of "acceptable" feelings to have - it's as if you're trying to play music on a grand piano by only using 7 out of he 88 keys. You lack range of expression.

There is beauty and power in the high notes, and there is power and healing in the low notes. They're all yours, and they're all part of your Whole story.

My spirit guides say that this week, you are being called to step in to the full range of your soul's expression, including all of you: the highs and the lows.

And with it being the longest nights of the year this week, this is the best time to embrace the power and healing laying in wait for you in your Shadow. It's time to dive into the Dark Gift of Disappointment.​​​​​​
I go in to this in detail in this week's video. Click the link or video above to watch.

Remember:

You create your reality. You create your flow.

You also can destroy your flow.
The choice is yours.

In case you were not aware: you are not alone in this. We are walking this journey of universal service (as conscious entrepreneurs) and spiritual ascension (as spiritual beings).

The fight to stay grounded and clear in mind, body and business is a daily one. I know.

So I will continue to share these messages out of devotion to my soulmate clients who may be watching from the sidelines; to my Loves who are up at 3am praying for the strength to keep serving their clients and community, praying for a safe place and a safe person who can help them accept themselves, too. Someone who can help them clear their energy, get out of their own way and finally grow and flow into their goals of having massive positive impact. 

Is that you? (Or someone you know?)
If so, I see you, and I am here when you are ready.

You are enough.
You are ready.
You are worthy.

I believe that you do not have to lose your glow as you grow in life and business. 
I believe that you have what it takes to make your vision happen, and that with a little extra love, you will see it manifest and come to fruition.

And that's what I'm here for. If you sense that you need to ground and clear or balance and align your energy in your life and business, and are seeking support in doing so, don't hesitate to reach out. 

You are not weird or crazy for sensing it - it's NORMAL! 
Well, our tribe's "normal." *wink*

As an empath AND an entrepreneur myself, I understand that your energy is everything, especially in businessman a very deep and personal level. 

Your energy is everything because when you feel better, you do better.
It's that simple. 

And when you're energy is off kilter, you feel stressed, stuck and scattered, and that can stop you in your tracks, which cuts off the universal flow of abundance and positive manifestation in your life. 

Manifestation of health, love, money, energy, progress...
I can help you with that.

So let's talk about it -  I'm just one text message away: book your session by clicking below or texting "PRIVATE SESSIONS PRICING" to +1-732-903-8573 for private session pricing and scheduling options now.

With love, that you may shine your light,

S. Victoria

Sensei Victoria Whitfield - Personal Energy and Business Coach for Spiritual CEOs, Business Reiki Master™ | Strategic Meditation for High Performance | Intuitive Business Development | Personal Energy Mastery 

Web: VictoriaWhitfield.com
Mobile: +1-732-903-8573

The post Dealing With Disappointment At Work appeared first on Sensei Victoria Whitfield.

Dear Love,

Lately all we do is rush, rush, rush.

"Hurry up!"
"Get the lead out!"
"Pick up the pace."
"Get a move on."
"You snooze, you lose."

Why are you always rushing yourself?

Especially when you know that you don't do nearly as good a job when you rush yourself as when you take your time. Where is this coming from?

Perhaps you were rushed by well-meaning family, teachers or friends as a child, and so you learned to rush yourself so that you don't have to endure their shame and nagging.

Or maybe you were made to feel slow or stupid when you didn't react or think as fast as others, and so you learned from them to be impatient with yourself, as a rule of thumb.

My spirit guides are saying to watch out this week for rushing yourself, because that is fueling your pattern of self sabotage.

Let's talk about it:

I explore this in detail in this week's video: CLICK TO WATCH on YouTube.

In an alternate, negative universe, everybody wins when you sabotage your own progress, and everybody wins when you are distracted.

You win because you are off the hook and don't have to deal with upsetting your status quo.
Others win for the same reason; they are let off the hook not having to deal with you upsetting their status quo.

And, anyone who is seeking power and control over you and others wins, because the less progress you make, and the less you have the ability to focus, the more you are a compliant pawn in helping them realize their agenda.

My spirit guides say that if you are reading this email though, the above idea makes your skin crawl, because the last thing you want is to be somebody else's pawn, let alone make no progress and have everything remain the same.

You and me both!

But if that's the case, then why are you allowing yourself to be distracted so often, especially while doing what you love or spending time with people you love? 

I'll tell you why: focus is a CHOICE and a skill to be developed.

Are you having a hard time getting and staying focused?
Can't seem to stop sabotaging your progress, and wonder if you're blocked?

If so, let me help you get the clarity you need to move forward:
CLICK TO BOOK A CLARITY CALL WITH VICTORIA NOW

Technology rewards us for handing over our ability to make our own choices on what to pay attention to because we are currently living in the Age of Attention.
Read that sentence again.

Notifications, pop ups, funnels, commercials, apps, ai-driven data results, social media doom scrolling, algorithms, tracking cookies and ads guide our decisions on what to focus on through a constant stream of interruptions.

Calculated colors, sounds, branding, haptics (the vibrations of your device), editing and catchy sayings stimulate our senses to trigger pleasure sensations in the brain and associate Their Choice with pleasure. 

This influences what we focus on, without us even knowing most of the time.

And, "wherever your awareness goes, energy flows" so that means your energy is being siphoned away from what you want to focus on and instead to Their Choice for you to focus on, so that your energy can fuel the realization of Their agenda.

Who are "They"? It doesn't matter; They are not YOU.

Just for today, focus on YOU and Your unique point of view, on moving the needle forward on Your agenda and choosing Your Choice.

And the secret for reconnecting to You and Your ability to focus is practicing the art and skill of Pausing Powerfully, as you go about your day, each day, this week.I go in to this in detail in this week's video. Click the link or video above to watch.

Remember:

You create your reality. You create your flow.

You also can destroy your flow.
The choice is yours.

In case you were not aware: you are not alone in this. We are walking this journey of universal service (as conscious entrepreneurs) and spiritual ascension (as spiritual beings).

The fight to stay grounded and clear in mind, body and business is a daily one. I know.

So I will continue to share these messages out of devotion to my soulmate clients who may be watching from the sidelines; to my Loves who are up at 3am praying for the strength to keep serving their clients and community, praying for a safe place and a safe person who can help them accept themselves, too. Someone who can help them clear their energy, get out of their own way and finally grow and flow into their goals of having massive positive impact. 

Is that you? (Or someone you know?)
If so, I see you, and I am here when you are ready.

You are enough.
You are ready.
You are worthy.

I believe that you do not have to lose your glow as you grow in life and business. 
I believe that you have what it takes to make your vision happen, and that with a little extra love, you will see it manifest and come to fruition.

And that's what I'm here for. If you sense that you need to ground and clear or balance and align your energy in your life and business, and are seeking support in doing so, don't hesitate to reach out. 

You are not weird or crazy for sensing it - it's NORMAL! 
Well, our tribe's "normal." *wink*

As an empath AND an entrepreneur myself, I understand that your energy is everything, especially in businessman a very deep and personal level. 

Your energy is everything because when you feel better, you do better.
It's that simple. 

And when you're energy is off kilter, you feel stressed, stuck and scattered, and that can stop you in your tracks, which cuts off the universal flow of abundance and positive manifestation in your life. 

Manifestation of health, love, money, energy, progress...
I can help you with that.

So let's talk about it -  I'm just one text message away: book your session by clicking below or texting "PRIVATE SESSIONS PRICING" to +1-732-903-8573 for private session pricing and scheduling options now.

With love, that you may shine your light,

S. Victoria

Sensei Victoria Whitfield - Personal Energy and Business Coach for Spiritual CEOs, Business Reiki Master™ | Strategic Meditation for High Performance | Intuitive Business Development | Personal Energy Mastery 

Web: VictoriaWhitfield.com
Mobile: +1-732-903-8573

The post The Secret To Getting And Staying Focused appeared first on Sensei Victoria Whitfield.

Scared to stand out and take up space?

Shrinking yourself physically or emotionally to make others comfortable, or even for fear of being seen?

Do you tend to "keep your mouth shut" around others, rather than speaking your mind openly?

Our bodies are mirrors of our emotional health and mindset.

So if you live with chronic tightness, aches and pains, that's actually a physical manifestation of limiting beliefs you have about yourself.

Watch this week's 11-minute love letter video, the final installment of our 5-week series on living life unapologetically, to release all restriction and boldly take up space in life and business!

"I don't trust myself to be able to get my point across."

So this is week five of five in our deep dive into living life unapologetically. Yeah.

This has been a powerful, powerful series of living fully, right? And embracing our brilliance, living as if, as we discussed last week, we're already worthy, right?

There's nothing additional that needs to be done. We're worthy now. If you missed that, go back on YouTube, check it out. Watch that video.

This week, the spirit guides have said our topic is taking up space. Take up space. Do this with me. Spread your arms out. Open your chest. Breathe deep and exhale. Take up space, right?

Are you someone, if you are blessed vertically, if you're tall, do you tend to hunch, or stand with a slouch so that you appear shorter? Are you someone who feels a bit insecure about speaking up, so instead, rather than waste people's time, or be annoying and take up space, you tend to hurry yourself.

Do you hurry yourself when you're speaking, or not even express anything? In your home, by the way, is there no space for you, or is all your stuff crammed into the corner or shoved into a drawer? Are you afraid to really spread out so that you can be creative and expressive?

Right? No, that's not for you. That's for the kids. You're not allowed, right?

If that's you, be kind to yourself. Just because other people take up space doesn't mean that you are not allowed to. There's enough space for all of us. That's a tweetable, as Marie Forleo would say.

Know this, there's enough space for all of us. You are enough. The world is enough. There's enough time for all of us. Be kind to yourself.

‪Know this: There's enough space for all of us. Just because other people take up space, doesn't mean that you're not allowed to. Take up space, #unapologetically!

If you carry shame, right? Do you carry that shame around all ... You know, "I have something to say, but you know, everybody has something to say, and I don't really trust myself to get my point across, so instead of being articulate, and expressing openly, I'll be quiet, and watch everyone else try and fail, but at least, you know, I didn't try, so I didn't fail." I'm giving you a big hug if this is you. I know this is tough. Oh my goodness. Take up space.

But this week in particular, the guides are showing images of you decompressing your body. Stretch. Go ahead. Stand up, like right now. Stand up. Get up, get up, and reach over your head, tickle the ceiling, wherever you are, tickle it and just radiate your light in all directions.

Allow your hips to roll open. Stretch your jaw, right? Your eyes, stretch your eyes. Yeah. Roll your shoulders. Roll them open. Do freestyle, whatever you need to do to open up any tightness in your body. Take up space.

Be kind to yourself.

If you're afraid of taking up space in conversation, or even with your marketing, for example, to all my entrepreneurs and business owners, if you're uncomfortable being visible, and commanding attention, start with your body. Let's be clear. We're going to start internally. The healing starts with you.

You don't have to worry about anybody else, but instead, open your body first. Decompress, right? I can't show you this on camera, but if you were to hang over your knees and let your head be pulled down by gravity, you could even decompress your spine. So important.

So, it's essential for you, in living life unapologetically, to not be so compressed all the time. This is an apology for being in the same space as everyone else, and this is affirming that there's not enough space for you. Trust me, the universe is big enough to handle you. In all your imperfections and all your awesomeness, the universe is big enough.

Come out and play. Make it open, and even if it's a bit messy, whatever, right? Be kind to yourself. You don't have to do it perfectly.

So take up space, and stretch especially. Stretch open your body. Imagine, by the way, as you stretch your body, filling the space with your energy, as if you were shining light and radiating light into the entire room, into the entire building, out into the town, out into the state, around the country, and out into the world, right?

Radiate that permission to take up space. Do it for your brothers and sisters who are in extreme poverty, right? Who are oppressed, and depressed, and repressed. Open your body on behalf of our tribe, on behalf of our tribe. Take up space.

I'm hearing the Oracle Cards calling the energy this week, again is our last with the daily guidance from the Angels, another Oracle Cards deck, one of the many that have been donated here at the dojo, always accepting donations. Okay, Angels. What do we need to know right now, about taking up space? Cupid. Beautiful. Aw, there's so much love in this card, Cupid. Oh, the heart bubble. So sweet.

"We send great waves of love into your heart and mind, awakening your love for life itself. Your clear decision to accept and enjoy romance has triggered this awakening. Allow yourself to spontaneously celebrate love in all of its glorious aspects."

So, my guides are telling me ... This Angel card has come forward in particular, for you to welcome love into your life. Yes, romantic love. Yes, physical love. Yes, emotional love. Yes, love. Opening up to receive more love in your life starts with you being open and decompressed, right? Take up space.

Give yourself permission to say, "Hi. What's your name?" To all of my single people out there, take up space, get yourself a ... like, you know, a seat at the coffee shop and type on your laptop conspicuously. Take up space, and if you are married, or with a partner, your lover, take up space with them. Like, "I desire to be with you," or "I'm going to be in your space because I love you," yeah? Take up emotional space. You can say what you need and you can express yourself. This is your permission.

This week in particular, take up space. How are you going to do it, right? Are you just going to start with the physical stretching more, and making sure that your body physically is open and lubricated, or are you also going to take it the emotional and social level? Are you going to take up space in your relationships and interactions?

Comment below on YouTube, on Facebook, send me an email back, right? I want to hear it. How are you taking up space. I love love and I love love letters, so send me a mail. Send me a love letter in the mail. I just got one. Yay! Thanks, Johanna. Hers is right there, that white piece of paper, pink writing. So beautiful. Thank you, goddess.

And, make sure you subscribe on YouTube so that you get these love letters first every week, all right? Live life unapologetically.

We'll see you next time. Bye.

(Original post 01/29/2018)

VictoriaWhitfield.com
Facebook.com/SenseiVictoriaWhitfield

Just for Today...

Decide to act and live as if you are already worthy: of love, wealth, health, etc..

Imagine that you had permission to make a million mistakes right now, and still be “ok” regardless.

Notice how you feel at that moment - you're already healing!

SHARE THIS! You’d be surprised how many people you know right now are in desperate need of healing and could use this information to change their life. If you can read this, you know someone who needs this Love Letter!

Want spiritual support on your healing journey but don't know where to start? Let's work #together!

Click the pink button below to take your Abundance Energy Jumpstart Assessment with Victoria and jumpstart your healing journey, today! 

The post Love Letters | Take Up Space, Unapologetically – Part 5 of 5 appeared first on Sensei Victoria Whitfield.

Is your email inbox overwhelming you?

Does the energy of your social media newsfeed bring you down?

Are negative news and stressful business reports literally making you sick to your stomach?

Be kind to yourself: you're an empath and you need better boundaries to protect your energy.

Not all entrepreneurs are created equal; some of us need to unplug in order to be productive.

Watch this week's 8-minute Love Letter video, the second in our 4-week exploration of the Power of Positive Community, to embrace the healing power of unplugging and unsubscribing!

"I don't know where all of this negativity is coming from."

This is week two of four in our new deep dive on the power of positive community. This week in particular the guides want you to know it's time for you to unsubscribe from negativity.

It's time for you to unsubscribe from negativity.

Info diet, in the words of Tim Ferriss, writer of The 4-Hour Workweek and how he simplified his life by streamlining things brilliantly. My guides this week in particular are asking that you have the courage to hit the unsubscribe button, or the unfollow button. Instead of hitting buttons, in your interpersonal life, remove yourself from negative sources of information and experience.

It's really, really important for you to feel vigilant around your intake. If you're watching this video, chances are that you are an empath, which means you pick up ambient emotional data by default. No one has to clue you in on to what is the emotional status of the room or what's the temperature of the crowd or what's going on from other people. You don't even have to ask. You can feel it.

And in fact, the dark side of being an empath is you absorb. You absorb energy. Sometimes even in your body. If someone else has a stomach ache, then you have a stomach ache, too because it just leaps right into you.

Know this: ‪Being an #empath in #business makes you a great communicator. However, if you lack #healthy boundaries and self-care, your empathic sense can drain your energy or even harm you. Be kind to yourself.

With love, that's a sign that you have a lack of healthy boundaries and self-care. I call that spiritual hygiene. Be kind to yourself if that's the situation for you. In psychology, they call that codependent.

When we're codependent, we have a hard time saying no because we depend on the things that we latch onto for our identity. If that's the case, we're subscribing and subscribing, and maybe as an entrepreneur or business owner you've been networking and to be nice, you allow people to just add you on to their email lists or so-and-so in your family keeps posting on Facebook all of this heavy, heavy, heavy reports and angry stuff. And because this is so-and-so in your family, you haven't unfollowed them.

This week in particular it's time to take a stand for your energetic health, your mental health and well being by unsubscribing and unplugging from sources of negativity.

But first and foremost, you've got to be vigilant on what your intake is. Before you even get to the point of unsubscribing, some of you may already think, "Oh yeah, spring cleaning. Read it. Thank you for permission." And to those of you who are ready, mwah. But to those of you who are like, "I don't know where all of the negativity is coming from," maybe this week in particular, you're just becoming vigilant and aware, becoming mindful of, "Huh whenever I talk to this person or hang out with this group, I feel drained afterward. Whenever I read this newspaper or visit this website and read through or watch the videos, I feel more anxious or even a little bit more heavy, depressed, and tired." Start monitoring your information intake.

In nutrition, they say you are what you eat. The same goes for your mindset.

How can you expect to have an abundant mindset when everyone and everything around you that you're taking in is talking about lack, fear, struggle, and it's hard, etc., etc.

I'm hearing the oracle cards calling in the energy to completely counteract that. Let me come in a little bit closer. It's the fairies. Healing with the fairies, we're gonna be journeying with all month.

So happy to be with you fairies. And I'm curious, fairies, elementals, guides, what do we need to know right now about unplugging from negativity? Ooh. Yeah, buddy. This is where we're going to leave off for the week.

Raise your standards. Absolutely. Raising your standards. Gorgeous card. The fairies are letting you know that you're not stepping back or shrinking down. Instead this is a statement that you have raised your standard for how you are treating your mind by making sure that you're clear and deliberate around what you put into it. Raise the standard of the type of emails that you desire to read.

Raise the standard of the type of phone calls that you desire to receive. Raise the standard of the type of people that you desire to be around, and raise the standard for the way that people should be treating you, regardless of who they are or where they come from.

That comes from you. The standard is always set by you. And it's time to raise your standards by unplugging from negativity.

So, comment below. Send me an email back. If you've got this on the love letters list. Let me know what's come up for you.

This is meant to be a conversation, a two-way street. And remember, if there is any way I can help in your business balancing mind, body, and business for you, just let me know.

You can go to VictoriaWhitfield.com/contact and reach out there. For now, that's it for this week, and we'll see you next time. Bye.

(Original post 04/09/2018)

VictoriaWhitfield.com

Facebook.com/SenseiVictoriaWhitfield

Just for Today...

Be vigilant about what’s draining your energy, and get rid of it.

Give yourself permission to unsubscribe to any news channels, email lists, social media or networking groups that are negatively affecting you.

Notice how you feel at that moment - you're already healing!

SHARE THIS! You’d be surprised how many people you know right now are in desperate need of healing and could use this information to change their life. If you can read this, you know someone who needs this Love Letter!

Want spiritual support on your healing journey but don't know where to start? Let's work #together!

Click the pink button below to take your Abundance Energy Jumpstart Assessment with Victoria and jumpstart your healing journey, today!

The post Love Letters | Unplug From Negativity – Part 2 of 4 appeared first on Sensei Victoria Whitfield.

Are you, or is someone you know, a workaholic?

Worried that if you say "no" when people who ask for help, that you'll be mean or they won't like you?

Drowning in projects and things to manage, at work AND at home?

It's easier to just give in and say "yes" and be seen as helpful, than to stand your ground and say "no" and be seen as possibly selfish.

But when we do that, we add another project on to our already overwhelmed plate of "helpfulness" - perhaps this is more than just being helpful, perhaps it's now an addiction.

Watch this week's 15-minute love letter for the fifth and final installment in our 5-week deep dive on self care versus self sabotage to send healing to our relationship with (personal and professional) help-a-holism.

"I never feel like I'm doing enough."

We've been on a five-week-long deep dive into the dance that we empaths do between self-care and self-sabotage. All the different ways that we stand in the way of shining our light to our fullest potential. I'm really grateful. I just want to thank you for tuning in for week five.

I want to thank you for all your support over the years, of the love letters, my gosh. What? We're going on four or five years straight of love letters. I just want to thank you for your continued support.

This week in particular, we're going to focus on self-sabotage around workaholism and help-a-holism, fix-a-holism. Helping, and fixing, and putting out all the fires, and working all the limbs all day. Those of us who are highly sensitive individuals who are naturally empathic, who are naturally intuitive. Last week we discovered your call to be a healer, your call to healing leadership. You're sensitive for that reason.

But this week is the dark side of that, where you can be so driven to help, and to fix, and to take care give, and to take responsibility; but you lose yourself. Not only lose yourself, you may even hurt yourself.  Be kind yourself, if this is you. This last one, baby, is for you. This is our swan song, yes?

Workaholism, guides say that the soul craving behind that, or that the hidden feeling driver behind helping everybody, and fixing everything, and working constantly. The addiction to work, and projecting.

Not just projecting stuff, we're projecting people, like in your relationships, yes, yes? Maybe this isn't you, maybe we're talking about somebody else. We can pretend.

But, maybe let that obsession with being everybody's caregiver, taking care of everybody and everything. What's the hidden driver behind that?

And the guides say that it is the feeling of, "I'm not good enough. I'm not doing enough. I am good when I am doing. I am only good when I am doing."

Doing good, doing stuff for other people, pleasing others, when I'm gaining approval. Yes, yes? When I'm gaining recognition, I am worthy based on my output ... which is faulty.

Yes, it is good to do good things and to help others. This is not to say that you shouldn't be helping other people, and that you should be like, "All right, screw you all, I'm going home." Right? Pulling a Cartman. No, that's not what we're talking about here.

As much as that sounds fabulous to one of you ... I just heard someone in the energies saying, "I want to tell everyone, 'Go away.'" If that's you ... Bear with me, we're going to make it through this.

But, what's also coming up behind that, as your working, working, working and saying yes to everything; the flipside is the fear of saying, "no." Our lack of boundaries is fueling this relentless need for approval and affirmation. In the workplace, or in the eyes of someone that you helped, or getting to see their transformation so you feel worthy, because they had an outcome or you had an impact on them.

What happens, however, when there's nothing to do, no one to save, nothing to fix? The big question is, are you still worthy? Are you still lovable? Are you still acceptable? Are you still good? Are you still okay, as a person if you don't have something to do, something to do, something to do? This is a big one. When we have this addiction, this also expresses as a lack of boundaries.

What are boundaries? This is the million-dollar word for every single empath like, ever: boundaries. Boundaries are the invisible lines that separate what is you and what is not you; what is yours and what is not yours.

Now, from a spiritual perspective, yes, there is the universal law of oneness, which says, "All that is, is one." But that doesn't mean you have to do everything all the time, or that everything that's yours belongs to everybody else, or that you don't have any selfness. You don't have a worth because you don't have a self.

No. That's not what that is saying. Instead, that's just to appreciate the interconnectedness and interdependence of all of life, and all that is. However, we're talking about this turning into co dependence. Codependency is when you depend on someone or something outside of you for a sense of emotional security, to give you your emotional security, or even your identity. You're depending on them.

Click to share the Tweet of the Week:

Know this: Codependents need to DO stuff to feel worthy. Who are you without your projects?

Are you loving The Love Letters? If so, please support our healing work with a love donation:

--

Workaholism, for example, my dad was a lawyer, I'm a lawyer, my kids are going to be a lawyer. If I ever lose this job, I don't know what I'm gonna do; where your job defines your personality. That's a codependent relationship. That means that you are at risk of losing yourself if that thing shifts at all. You've given all your power over to the thing that you are dependent upon.

Be kind to yourself if this is speaking to you. I don't know who this message is for, but I'm sharing it anyway, following spirit's guidance. With that, also, where we have the sense of addiction to getting things done and putting out fires, putting out fires putting out fires. Whenever we put out a fire, we get that little bit of, "Yay, I did it." And that, "Yay," is what we're addicted to, of winning and the feedback loop of, "I'm putting out and I'm receiving, putting out and I'm receiving."

That's why so many men end up becoming not present at home, because the job is what gives them recognition and affirmation constantly, and you come home to a wife that is just not paying attention, and not able to give you that feedback. It is, unfortunately, natural to become addicted more to work, where you're recognized, and you feel like you have an impact in the relationship more with your job than your own partner. Scary.

That happens to women, too, I'm not just talking about men, okay. I hear my guide saying, "This happens to the ladies, too," where work or the kids become more important than their partner, because there's something to work on. There's always something. The mom-ness becomes the identity rather than yourself being your identity, becoming codependent to the children.

Be kind to yourself if this is you. Now, this week in particular, the guides are saying, "How do we get out of this?" This addiction to working and losing ourself without our boundaries. Well, is to have values. This week in particular, you want to focus on writing out a list of what your core, desired feelings and your most prioritized values are in life. Allow your schedule to be according to what you prioritize most, what you value the most.

First things first, as they say. I believe that's in the Seven Habits of Highly Effective People. Put first things first. Is family really important to you? If so, where is family in your schedule? This week, we want to put, "What are your core desired feelings?" I want to feel free, I want to feel abundant, I want to feel loved, I want to feel sensual. Where are those feelings in how you spend your time each day? Rather than letting the thing that you are co dependently addicted to, such as the work or the caregiving, et cetera rather than letting only that determine how you spend your time.

This is going to shift your relationship with your workaholism. Your addiction is going shift. If you can just get clear on, "What are your core, desired feelings, and what are your most prioritized values?"

We forget, we're in that tunnel of, "I'm doing stuff, I'm doing stuff, I'm doing stuff. I'm so productive, I'm so busy. I'm doing all this busy stuff." There's a difference between being busy and actually being in business. There's a difference between being busy and actually being focused.

This, our core, desired feelings and our most prioritized values are what are going to help us clarify that. To end, Doreen Virtue, Angel Therapy; yet another one of our Doreen Virtue decks. Angels, what we need to know this week? To round off our five-week deep dive into the dance between self sabotage and self care. "Listen to your intuitive feelings."

Listen to your intuitive feelings. Your body is receiving accurate messages from the divine. This is perfect, given what we're talking about.

One of the main reasons why we can get stuck in, or create stuck-ness in a codependent, workaholic, fixaholic relationship is because we'll drown out the sensations of our body. We're not in touch. We're not in touch with ... "Oh, my neck is starting to hurt because it's 10:00 PM and I'm still at work."

We'll just keep going, going, going. Or, you know what? I actually ... I'm not really hungry for that extra candy bar, as we talked ... The second week was food. I'm not actually hungry for that chocolate candy bar. Actually, I'm craving love and affection.

Instead of shoving a chocolate candy bar down my throat so I can stay working at the computer all the livelong day, instead I'm going to reach out to receive some physical touch, or love and affection from a loved one. Listen to your feelings.

Your sensitivity is your strength here, and it's the gateway to your next level in life. Send me an email back, comment below. Let me know what's coming up for you around this, and how has this series been for you?

Are you liking the multi-week deep dives? Let me know, let me know.

Source has been telling me that you and I have got to develop a deeper relationship, and go deeper into the information, rather than just doing one idea a week. Nah, let's go there. Let's go there together, okay?

Make sure you subscribe on YouTube so that you get your love letters every week, and I'll see you next time. Muah, bye

VictoriaWhitfield.com
Facebook.com/SenseiVictoriaWhitfield

Just for Today...

Put first things, first.

Write a list of your core values and core desired feelings, and see if you're spending your time each day accordingly.

Notice how you feel at that moment - you're already healing!

-

Hello there. I am Sensei Victoria Whitfield, your business reiki master. And it's my joy to get to support empathic entrepreneurs and business owners like you in getting and staying grounded and clear in mind, body and business.

Welcome back to another installment of your weekly love letter from the dojo at naturalintuition.com and victoriawhitfield.com, my blog. These are your sources for channeled holistic stress management techniques and guidance for developing your natural intuition. Whether you're looking to improve the quality of your personal and professional life, let this love letter be your reminder that you are not alone and that together we can make that happen.

Let's schedule a chat, and see how I can help you...

The post Love Letters | Busy-ness Self Sabotage – Part 5 of 5 appeared first on Sensei Victoria Whitfield.

What are the symptoms of turning into a techno-zombie?

Have you Become One with your Netflix and DVR accounts?

Bit by the Email Timesuck Vampire AGAIN? There goes another three hours!

FOMO or Fear of Missing Out has driven us as empathy and as entrepreneurs to be literally attached at the hip to our cellphones and other tech at all times.

And as technology continues to innovate, it's getting harder and harder to tell the difference between being productive and being distracted by it.

Watch this week's 14-minute love letter video for the third installment of our 5-week deep dive into self-care versus self-sabotage, and start healing your relationship with technology.

"I carry my phone everywhere."

We are on week three of five in our deep dive into the dance that we empaths do, between self-care and self-sabotage, right? Dancing that fine line like a boss, or not.

Kind of like a slave, right? If we're really looking at what are our addictions? How are we soothing ourselves versus actually caring for ourselves, right?

Last week, we talked about food, right? And emotional stuffing, how we use food to stuff our feelings, our empathic overwhelm down, so be kind to yourself if that's you, or if you haven't seen that, go ahead and go back in the playlist on YouTube, or back on the earlier blog post on victoriawhitfield.com. You'll see it there.

This week, this is a bit of like a meta-analysis, right? It's the analysis of the actual thing that's happening right now, is technology.

Social media and technology! It's so good, right?

How are we doing self-care versus self-sabotage, with all this technology stuff all over us, right? How impersonal does this feel, by the way, now that you can see my phone as I'm talking to you? Like, it's changed the whole look.

I'm not acting any differently, but now that I'm looking at or having my phone on camera, that feels different talking to you, versus you having my full attention. Hmm. So this is something that we have got to talk about, because you and I are looking at each other thanks to technology right now, right?

Current research says cell phone users touch their phone - they don't even really use it, they just touch it - between 2,500 and 5,500 times per day, spending an average of two to five hours within the screen, and this is just the phone, right?

I didn't even look at TV, or look at computer, laptop, or billboards, and GPS, and all the technology, and then other people's phones, and TVs, and laptops, and computers, and yada yada yada, the list goes on.

It's total technological immersion that we've got going on right now, and yes, it's connectivity, but there's a difference between connecting and feeling connected, right?

So with our phones, and all of these screens that we have around us, there is an emotional need that we are fulfilling, so this week in particular, my guides are bringing forward the Erickson, who came up with the six human needs?

So everybody has basic, human needs, right? That have got to be fulfilled in order for us to feel safe, happy, and fulfilled in life.

Even just normal, right, filling our needs is necessary for satisfying our baseline as human beings. It's just natural, and the six human needs are certainty, right? To know things that are going to be the same.

You know what the outcome is going to be. You know what to expect, right? Certainty. "I'm certain." Also, then, uncertainty. So, to know things are going to be spicy, and interesting, and we'll have adventures, and spontaneity, and diversity, right? Uncertainty.

Next is connection and love, so those two are kind of grouped together, but this is to feel connected to those around us, feel connected to something outside of ourselves, right? To be involved, to be in relationship of some sort. It doesn't even have to be with a human being, right? I think in Japan, they're marrying robots, some people are. Google it.

Four is significance. So, to know that you matter, or that you've been seen, and recognized, and acknowledged, that you're not just operating in a vacuum, but that, "Oh, I'm significant to something, someone, somehow," or, "I am significant," right? Those are our four universal, basic human needs. Everybody's into this. The last two are more spiritual in nature.

Number five is for growth. So, the need to feel like there's progress being made, that we're moving forward, or that we're getting better with time, things are developing momentum. Then six is for contribution, so to know that you have a legacy, or that you made a difference, that you taught something, or somebody, that there was an impact that was made. Those are our six human needs.

Now, if you just have three of those human needs, it's an addiction. Anything above that, you can forget about it. It'll dominate your life.

Technology, how many of those six human needs, right? Already, yes, we're going in to connect, right? Trying to connect, stay connected, get connected. How many times do you see that online, or on the computer, or wherever you're looking, whatever screen you're sucking on, right?

Click to share the Tweet of the Week:

Know this: There's a difference between connecting and feeling connected.

Are you loving The Love Letters? If so, please support our healing work with a love donation:

--

Then, certainty, to know that everything is the same. I know the weather is the same as it's expected, right? Then uncertainty, "Ooh, look at this different shiny object, or squirrel on a pole, dancing," or something on Facebook.

So we've already got three there. Oh no! Then, well we've got contribution, posts, right? Like, comment, engage, subscribe. Legacy, oh no!

So, I'm sure I missed one, but you fill in the blank. Our human needs are absorbed in these screens, that are following us around all day.

Source wants you to know that the feeling behind that, the spiritual truth behind that, one is you're feeling lonely, bored, under-stimulated, anxious, and impatient. These are all the uncomfortable feelings that we'll have that will cause us to reach, those 2,500 to 5,500 times for our phone, for example, in a given day.

Unbelievable. I'm still flabbergasted by that number, but hey, you know, it's what the research says, as of 2017. So, be kind to yourself if that's you, right? You live with your phone, or you talk with your phone, or your phone is always on your hip, on your boob, on your ... Screens everywhere.

It's those low vibe feelings, though, that we are trying to escape. So this is what we want to honor this week, in particular, with your energy, is how are you escaping life? So this is our form of self-care, right? We're trying to care for these feelings of emptiness, loneliness, feeling bored, or under-stimulated, or even curious.

We're caring for that by escaping, right? Taking off, into the bowels of Google, or into the depths of Netflix, right? Or wherever you're going, in technology. Technology is meant for you to feel connected and have access. It does not put limits on you.

Now, there is an app, one of my awesome clients ... Hi, Elaine! She uses, called Moment, which is tracking you, how many minutes you've been on your phone, and you can start to raise your own self-awareness of, "Oh my gosh, I've been eating my phone for the last few days," right? It tracks your usage. Moment. It looks like a light green and white flower, if you're looking for it in the App Store, to help you, and it'll also give you alerts to put your phone down.

You've met your limit, right? But most technology is built for access, like this infinite connectivity and access, and that is a breeding ground for addiction and escaping away from your natural energy. Very, very, very un-grounding.

So this week in particular, Source is asking us instead, to unplug at the Deep Dive Retreat. Every year, we practice three whole days unplugged, and yes, we go through withdrawal, and yes it's intense, but it's amazing what happens when you go back to being a natural human being. Suddenly you can see flowers, and smell the ocean breeze, or even just, if you're not by the ocean, you're just alive, and aware, "Oh, this part of my body aches. Ooh, I feel like moving more," right? You're so much more in tune to your health, and to your energy, when you start practice unplugging strategically.

So that's your assignment for this week. Here's the Oracle Card deck. Let me pull this right quick, before we run out of time. Indigo Angel Oracle Cards deck. Another Doreen Virtue deck. One of, I believe, 21 now. Angels, what do we need to know this week, about oh God, screen-sucking?

Ah, time to create. This is where we'll leave off. You know, the bright side of technology is that it gives us an incredible myriad of platforms for expressing our creativity. I double dare you to get creative when you feel the urge to screen-suck, whether it's TV, laptop, tablet, phone, right? When you get the urge to screen-suck, do something creative. Maybe it's change your clothes, or primp yourself, or start drawing, or make a paper shape, or whatever you can do to get creative.

What's coming up for you? Comment below, send me an email back, what happened when you did that? What are you going to plan to do? Are you going to plan to draw? I love doodling, by the way. I doodle on all receipts, so whenever I'm out eating, or shopping, or whatever, I doodle on every receipt that goes back to the waiter.

So, how are you going to express your creativity this week, instead of jumping on that technology thingy? It's going to suck your energy and your time away, right? Let me know. I'm excited to see it, right? And share your poem, share your images, share your songs. I would love to see them. If you want to post a video back, I can't wait to see you.

All right, are you ready for it? We'll see you next week for week four. Bye.

VictoriaWhitfield.com
Facebook.com/SenseiVictoriaWhitfield

Just for Today...

Unplug from technology, strategically.

Make time for creative expression with ZERO technology exposure - even try hiding all screens and machines under blankets if you must.

Notice how you feel at that moment - you're already healing!

-

Hello there. I am Sensei Victoria Whitfield, your business reiki master. And it's my joy to get to support empathic entrepreneurs and business owners like you in getting and staying grounded and clear in mind, body and business.

Welcome back to another installment of your weekly love letter from the dojo at naturalintuition.com and victoriawhitfield.com, my blog. These are your sources for channeled holistic stress management techniques and guidance for developing your natural intuition. Whether you're looking to improve the quality of your personal and professional life, let this love letter be your reminder that you are not alone and that together we can make that happen.

Let's schedule a chat, and see how I can help you...

The post Love Letters | Technology Self Sabotage – Part 3 of 5 appeared first on Sensei Victoria Whitfield.

What comfort food is your guilty pleasure?

Do you have certain foods that you can’t help yourself around?

When you feel sad, stressed or anxious, do you crave certain unhealthy foods to distract you from the discomfort?

Many of us - in first-world countries - stuff ourselves with food to hide from uncomfortable and negative emotions.

And entrepreneurs in particular tend to eat emotionally to crowd out the feelings of stress and overwhelm they endure keeping up with increasing and erratic amounts of work.

Watch this week's love letter on Food Self-Sabotage, which is part 2 of our 5-week deep dive series on self-care versus self-sabotage.

"When I'm anxious, I know eat food that's not good for me."

This week is week two of five. Our five week deep dive into that interplay between self care and self sabotage. That we dance. We dance across that line as empaths every single day.

Source has really pushed me to raise awareness around this because you have got to shine your light better.

Brighter, bigger, we need you, baby. So whatever it takes, we're gonna raise awareness, where you may be standing between you and your light shining at it's brightest and we just wanna honor that.

Not to make you feel wrong or beat yourself over the head for doing things that way, but instead just honoring that, that's coming up.

This week in particular, for week two out of five, the guides have requested us to talk about food. Oh man. Food, food and emotional stuffing. Alright, let's go there.

What kinds of foods do you eat? When you experience the feelings that are like the following. The following feelings of anxiety, worry, emptiness, boredom, anger, grief.

As I even just say those words, what kind of foods does your body want to ... You start getting cravings for. Is it for another diet soda? Is it for potato chips? Is it for cookies and chocolates and ... Or could it be for cheeseburgers just fill me to the brim, right? Or pizza? All of these stuffing foods versus fuel and clarity foods.

Now, a lot of my private clients, there's certain point in our sessions where we come to this one philosophy that I've said I don't know how many times, but there's two kinds of people in the world.

There's two kinds of people. You could tell by what's driving them.

People who desire clarity, and people who desire comfort. See where I'm going with this? Food.

People who desire clarity, they're going to confront the issue because they just want to clear the air, they're gonna take personal responsibility because that's empowering and it fosters more clarity. It spreads light.

They're going to take a stand and voice their opinion because we're looking for clarity. They're searching for truth.

But people who are desiring comfort are going to blame. It's easier to place blame on others or other events or things that happen in the past or imagines situations.

We're gonna place blame if we want comfort. We're going to feel more tired, we're gonna wanna rest more, we're gonna complain.

Whatever we can do to shirk responsibility and hot potato that off of us.

We're not going to express our opinion or rock the boat because if you rock the boat you'll get spanked. That's what happened in my childhood. So maybe that happened to you, or maybe you'll get denied love.

What did you learn in your childhood when you were really vocal? Were you acknowledged and held or were you punished?

Click to share the Tweet of the Week:

Know this: Most people's behaviors are motivated by a desire for Clarity or Comfort. You can tell by what’s on their plate.

Are you loving The Love Letters? If so, please support our healing work with a love donation:

--

This affects our emotional relationship with food because food essentially represents nourishment for our bodies. How you nourish yourself.

Do you nourish yourself for comfort, or do you nourish yourself for clarity? What types of foods are you craving? Maybe even right now.

Be kind to yourself. This is not a beat yourself up question, this is simply an awareness question.

What types of foods do you eat or especially reach for when you're under extra stress? Or you're feeling anxiety? Or you're feeling worried? Or you're lover or the person that you love is not acknowledging you, or acknowledging your feelings?

Or the government is not acknowledging your emotions and your feelings? What do you consume? What do you nourish yourself with? Is it food that increases your clarity or increases your comfort?

Now, be kind to yourself because if it's increasing just your comfort and not your clarity, if you're falling asleep after eating something, that's a sign that you're clarity is not increasing.

You're actually taxing yourself. That's called emotional stuffing.

We're stuffing down the feelings of emptiness in particular, such as loneliness, worry, fear, anxiety, anger. That hole, we're trying to stuff the hole full.

So many empaths do this. So you're not alone, I've done this. Remember my previous video, I lived on Twix.

Talk about stuffing, that stuff probably made out of sugar and cardboard. Who knows? Maybe some corn syrup thrown in for good measure, maybe for a little bit of nutrition. Terrible.

No wonder my body at the time was horridly inflamed, and constipated, and tight, and in pain. That's years in the past now. Thank God. But be kind to yourself if you're stuffing. You're emotionally stuffing.

The alternative would be instead to eat foods that cleanse you or increase your clarity. Last month, we talked about going on a cleanse and honoring that as a form of grounding, to clear your energetic system.

Do you drink water filled foods such as foods that require the sun in order for them to be created? Fill in the blank. I don't need to know what comes up for you around foods that require the sun in order to be created and foods that are filled with water. Use your thinking cap.

What comes up for you around that? But the alternative would be to have food that comes into your body with more photons, more nutrients, dense with light energy so you can shine brighter rather than stuff down.

Now, the oracle cards that are coming forward, this week in particular, are the romance angels. I don't know if this is backwards on camera. But this is ... Now I think we have 20 decks, 20 or 21. I just got another donation of a deck. Thank you. Thank you Paula. Yay. So good.

If you want to donate to the dojo, we are always open to receiving more decks because the tribe, the whole tribe uses all the different oracle cards that we have here.

Romance angels, emotional food stuffing. Most notorious of all. We need to know about our relationship with food and love. New love. Oh my, new love.

A new person has stirred your romantic feelings. What are you gonna do with that? There's so many things that can stimulate desire and many of the ways that we shame ourselves, self sabotage, being receptive to desire and new affection. A new stimulation is we stuff it down.

"Nope, I am not lovable, let me eat that cake. Let me eat that Smarties. Let me stuff that down." Be kind to yourself if that's what's coming up for you.

If you're afraid of rejection or even afraid of being seen, to all my entrepreneurs out there. How much do we eat to stuff down our visibility, our fear of being seen? Be kind to yourself if that's coming up for you.

So how can we begin eating foods that increase our clarity as oppose to just our comfort? Comment below, send me an email back. Let me know what's coming up for you, what foods are you craving?

By the way, let me see if I can pull this book out here. Doreen Virtue has a book that changed my life, The Care and Feeding of Indigo Children.

In here, she actually has a chart of what food means what emotionally. For example, craving chocolate is a desire for romance and love. Craving beer is the desire to shut out anxiety, wanting more love, fun, and appreciation.

You can deepen your healing journey by getting and reading this book, specifically in your relationship between self sabotage and "self care," the dark side of self care in our relationship with food.

Curious to hear if you're gonna get the book. Let me know what you think of it if you have read it. Did this book change your life too? It sure did mine. Alright. I will see you next week for week three of five and get ready for it. Bye.

VictoriaWhitfield.com
Facebook.com/SenseiVictoriaWhitfield

Just for Today...

Become aware of why you are eating the type of food you are eating during the day.

Ask yourself: "Am I eating this because I want to nourish myself, or am I eating this because I want to numb myself?"

Notice how you feel at that moment - you're already healing!

-

Hello there. I am Sensei Victoria Whitfield, your business reiki master. And it's my joy to get to support empathic entrepreneurs and business owners like you in getting and staying grounded and clear in mind, body and business.

Welcome back to another installment of your weekly love letter from the dojo at naturalintuition.com and victoriawhitfield.com, my blog. These are your sources for channeled holistic stress management techniques and guidance for developing your natural intuition. Whether you're looking to improve the quality of your personal and professional life, let this love letter be your reminder that you are not alone and that together we can make that happen.

Let's schedule a chat, and see how I can help you...

The post Love Letters | Food Self Sabotage – Part 2 of 5 appeared first on Sensei Victoria Whitfield.

Have you ever felt helpless?

And did that experience warp your ability to trust yourself and others?

Concerned that you can't tell the difference between self-care and self-sabotage because of what happened to you?

Sometimes bad things happen to good people... I know.

Yet Source wants you to know that all things can - and do - work together to form greater good in our lives.

Watch this week's 11-minute Love Letter to hear my story of overcoming a very dark time in my life and how I healed from cycles of self-sabotage to embracing a lifestyle of self-care and healing.

"I only smoke because it helps me cool off."

We're continuing the series, sourced this time around has asked to continue you and I building a deeper relationship and a deeper understanding about certain concepts that come up in our spiritual lives.

This series is going to be a five week series around the dark side of self-care. Woohoo. I'm so excited.

I am so excited to bring you to the dark side of self-care. What that basically looks like is self-sabotage.

Now this first week in particular the guides have asked me to share more of my story.

I just finished a session with a new client. I'm so excited for her. It's amazing what inspires people to begin their healing journey. She's beginning a new six month healing journey, Sojourner healing journey, which means she's coming in for an hour, a private hour a month for me. She also gets unlimited meditation classes here at the dojo.

It's so interesting to hear people's stories of what inspires them to begin to heal. What motivates you to really begin healing.

It was just fascinating sharing with her some of my story of what caused me to get into all of this in the first place.

Believe it or not, it comes from actually my pain.

Simon Sinek, very beautifully says that your big why comes from your pain more often than not.

For me, it was a series of three breakups that caused me to break open. The first one was someone that I thought I was going to be with. The whole soulmate situation that you think you have and then turns out sleeping with your coworker and calls you on your wedding day to ask how are you? One.

Two, the next one broke me open again because of the color of my skin. He had decided that we couldn't be together because of the color of my skin. That also compounded my perspective.

Then unfortunately the third one that really broke me open was when I got date raped. Yes, I'm sharing that with you.

No, I'm not happy about what happened to me. I honor the fact that these were the events that grabbed my attention that something is not quite right.

Now maybe you grew up with a history of abuse or maybe you grew up with alcoholic parents or that sort of a thing.

Something happened in our lives that forced us to take a stand and say, "Wait a minute. I don't like this. I don't like this." Right?

It's those moments where you put your foot down and say, "No more. I'm not going to be beaten anymore" or, "I'm not going to select people who would do these kinds of things to me anymore."

One of my first spiritual teachers her question to me, that changed my life, was: "what is the pattern in you that's creating this situation?"

This is where we get into our five week deep dive around self-sabotage.

When I look back into those dark times in my life where I would have suicidal thoughts and would be sleeping at around 22 hours a day, only getting up to go to the bathroom and have a sip of water, trying to escape, escape, escape there were things that I was doing to self-soothe that within my compressed mindset I thought were good for me.

When you have a compressed, like as in a really limited mindset, bad stuff you can't really tell that that's bad for you.

Some of the ways that I used to self-soothe but actually turned out being self-sabotage ... Well, one it was the constant sleeping. Also, I used to chain-smoke Clove cigarettes, the black ones. Like talk about breathing death. Emotional stuffing. I used to live on Twix and Chex-Mix and nothing else except for Captain Morgan's spiced rum and Malibu coconut rum. I remember. I'm so happy that I'm sober now.

There's these things that, "I'll just have a drink so that I can soothe" or escape, get rid of this negativity, or, "Let me go have a smoke. Let me cool off." Or, "Let me just check out." There's so many things that we do to soothe ourselves that within a limited and a compressed point of view feel pleasurable and we interpret them as good even though they're working against us.

Now there was also another form of self-sabotage I would do at the time. I would work around 12 hours or so a day at a really, really toxic job. Like screaming bosses that were financial abusers as in dangling your pay check over your head in order to get you to do things that are completely outside of your principles.

Be kind to yourself if as I invoke the darker side of my story that this is resonating for you like, "Ooh, ooh, I still do some of that, Victoria" ... This is not to say like, "I'm good and you're bad." No.

I want you to know that I've been through some things and when I'm going to talk to you over the next few weeks around self-sabotage versus self-care there's some history there. I'm only tapping on the tip of the iceberg here with respect to your energy.

Click to share the Tweet of the Week:

Know this: Be kind to yourself. What motivates great healing is usually great pain.

Are you loving The Love Letters? If so, please support our healing work with a love donation:

--
My story is my story and it's made me who I am. Here's the light in the darkness is that when you start self-soothing you can choose to raise the vibration of the forms of self-soothing that you do.

For example, I remember even when I was still chain-smoking I started learning more about crystals and oracle cards. "Well, you know, maybe this will help me feel better." It was something positive about these cards or I feel the energy when I'm holding this crystal. I don't know what the heck it is. I'm going to get into that in the next few weeks.

That was the turning point. It was following things that brought me joy and uplifted me in the self-soothing cycle. It's natural.

I want you to know this and watch this in yourself this week.

Watch the way that you soothe yourself, whether it's positive or negative. Just notice how do you soothe yourself when you're feeling bored, when you're feeling depressed, empty, anxious, angry, unacknowledged, lonely, et cetera. How do you soothe yourself? It is positive things? Or negative?

Most of us have a mixture of both. By the way, at the filming of this video I still have some not so good things, such as eating chocolate and ice cream, that is harmful against my body. As well as doing hours of meditation, grounding out in nature, doing reiki. I have a mixture.

This is called being human. I want us to have a deep dive now for the next five weeks around honoring that self-care versus self-sabotage dance that we're all doing.

I know that you're doing it. If you clicked play on this video chances are you're a natural empath. You're already sensitive to the energy and trying to figure out how to cope with all this energetic overload. We're going to confront this head-on.

We're going to dive deep together. I can't wait to see you next week and hear what you think.

Comment below. Tell me what's coming up for you around this.

Do you have a story that you wanted to share, by the way? Did my story bring up some of yours? I would love to witness you in sharing your story, privately, just to honor you. We don't want to post all that out in social media and all over the place.

Send me an email back and let me know and I'd be happy to set up a share your story call so that we can hold space for you speaking your truth for the first time.

I know it's tough. I feel you but we're going to get through this together.

Are you ready for this? Five weeks. Five weeks. Let's do this. Self-care versus self-sabotage. Going to the dark side. Whoop, whoop. Shining light so that we can all grow together. I'm sending you so much love and I'll see you next week. Bye.

VictoriaWhitfield.com
Facebook.com/SenseiVictoriaWhitfield

Just for Today...

Watch the way that you soothe yourself.

Track what you do to soothe negative feelings, to observe if it’s positive self-care or negative self-sabotage behavior..

Notice how you feel at that moment - you're already healing!

-

Hello there. I am Sensei Victoria Whitfield, your business reiki master. And it's my joy to get to support empathic entrepreneurs and business owners like you in getting and staying grounded and clear in mind, body and business.

Welcome back to another installment of your weekly love letter from the dojo at naturalintuition.com and victoriawhitfield.com, my blog. These are your sources for channeled holistic stress management techniques and guidance for developing your natural intuition. Whether you're looking to improve the quality of your personal and professional life, let this love letter be your reminder that you are not alone and that together we can make that happen.

Let's schedule a chat, and see how I can help you...

The post Love Letters | Self Care vs. Self Sabotage – Part 1 of 5 appeared first on Sensei Victoria Whitfield.

This is week four of five of our deep dive into shifting our perspective, so that we can step into our divinity, finally, in life and business.

If you are just seeing this for the first time and you didn't start from week one, please make sure that you go ahead and stop now, go back on my blog at VictoriaWhitfield.com, so that you can be grounded in this process. Start at week one.

For our fourth week, my spirit guides have said that we need to talk about the importance of knowing what is no longer tolerable. Last week, we really sank our teeth into our role, and knowing it clearly. We honored who we are and what our purpose is here on Earth: to be that guide, that light, that only you can shine, or only I can shine, from my own unique story, and yours within yours.

We're here, again, at Washington Rock in the dead of winter. It is a very foggy day, so normally we are able to see between 20 to 30 miles out. You might have seen that in the previous videos. But, this is so good, that the weather has shifted to be even more foggy, because this now brings the perspective inward. Right? That's a message and a representation of our intention right now, is to be very clear, inwardly, of what is no longer acceptable.

At your previous point of perspective of where you were coming from before, perhaps there were certain people, certain behaviors, certain foods, and certain investments that you were engaging in, that were acceptable. They were part of your standard operating procedure. And, when we get to a certain point of development, or achieve a certain level of success, there is this expectation that what's been working is going to continue to work.

Now, if you keep doing the same thing and expecting different results, however, that is unfortunately the definition of insanity. There's real satisfaction, there is real fulfillment in having progress, meaning, when we get to grow from our experiences. So, when we're called for to expansion and ascension, personally or professionally, that involves changing what our definition of what is tolerable.

I'm not exactly sure who this message is for. But, I want you, since you're watching or reading this right now, I want you to consider, “What am I tolerating?”

Ask yourself “what am I tolerating in my personal life?” for example, that is keeping me at this level of weight, or in this type of relationship. “What am I tolerating? Am I tolerating people talking down to me, or telling me how things need to be? Or, am I tolerating the reaction that my body has to certain foods, such as gluten?” for example. What are you tolerating personally, that could be reinforcing the same sick cycle recurring and recurring personally, but also professionally?

What are you tolerating? Are you tolerating receiving a certain level of income, because other people said you should be satisfied with that? Or, if you look to your right and you look to your left, that's what everybody else makes. And that's what everybody else is saying is “acceptable.” Are you tolerating that? Or are you tolerating, also professionally, a mentor or an authority figure that might rub you the wrong way in some key areas, but because other things are really great, you overlook that? You instead, stay, and follow their rules, but murmur about the things that bother you, on your off time or in quiet moments to yourself, or confidants.
--

Click to share the Tweet of the Week: Know this: What you are tolerating in life and business is what's keeping you stuck at the same level you've been at. Can you let it go? @SenseiWhitfield #plateau #womeninbusiness #entrepreneur

--
Are you loving The Love Letters? If so, please support our healing work with a love donation:

--

Be kind of yourself if that's your situation: that you're tolerating things. That can be a coping mechanism, to create a sense of stability, and I'm hearing this very loud and very aligned in the energy, to tell you that in order to create stability finally for yourself, you may have remove more tolerations from off your plate.

Be kind to yourself. There's a difference between telling yourself what’s acceptable and actually having clarity. When you're just accepting what you've been handed to you, there's a of lack of innovation there, a lack of agency. You don't have to give away your power. When you are clear that “this is what I want”, or clear that “this is how I feel”, and you voice that, as well as stand true to that, yes, it may trigger some people, or may ruffle some feathers, or make things a little unstable for a time. But, that's temporary, because you're getting back into alignment, putting yourself back at the center at which you deserve to be.

I'm hearing the oracle cards calling in the energy. All month we've been journeying with the Isis Oracle Cards Deck by Alana Fairchild, and I'll make this quick, because my fingers are freezing. Happy winter everyone! Let's see. Oh, gorgeous. Initiation. Spiritual testing of Ra and lady Isis.This is where we are going to leave off for the week.

The reason why you're shifting your perspective this week in particular, by getting clear on what is no longer tolerable and what you're no longer going to be tolerating, is because you're on a path to Initiation. This is your time. This is the time for you to shift. Not later, it's now. It's now.

And, when you decide that a certain thing is no longer acceptable, that activates your inner power. I can tell that to you from my own story, when I personally decided that being in an abusive relationship - which was most emotionally and, at times, financially, and even physically abusive - when I decided that was no longer acceptable, I was not going to tolerate this anymore, my whole life changed. I had behaviors, such as leaving that person and investing more in my own self-worth, and raising my confidence level, I had behaviors that followed through with that, because it was unequivocal.

I decided I'm not tolerating this anymore. Similarly, my behaviors shifted when I personally decided that smoking was no longer something I was going to tolerate as a behavior of mine, and being around people who smoke regularly was not acceptable either. I had asthma, and it would exacerbate my asthma. Since I quit my breathing has been so much better, and the quality of relationships that I have around me have been so much better, too.

So, what are you no longer tolerating? Comment below, or send me an email back, at VictoriaWhitfield.com/Contact, or Team@VictoriaWhitfield.com. Let me know, what are you no longer tolerating. What is no longer acceptable in your life and in your business? Make sure you subscribe on YouTube, so that you get these Love Letters first, every week, and I'll see you next time.

May you feel loved and safe at work, and please, enjoy the journey. Bye for now!

--

Just for today...

Take an inventory of what you are tolerating in life and business.

First, write out a list of Tolerations, and then secondly, go back through the list and for each line write out the real, honest reason why you are still (or are no longer) tolerating it.

Notice how you feel in that moment - you're already healing!

--

Hello there. I am Sensei Victoria Whitfield, your business reiki master. And it's my joy to get to support empathic entrepreneurs and business owners like you in getting and staying grounded and clear in mind, body and business.

Welcome back to another installment of your weekly love letter from the dojo at naturalintuition.com and victoriawhitfield.com, my blog. These are your sources for channeled holistic stress management techniques and guidance for developing your natural intuition. Whether you're looking to improve the quality of your personal and professional life, let this love letter be your reminder that you are not alone and that together we can make that happen.

Let's schedule a chat, and see how I can help you...

The post Love Letters | No Longer Tolerable – Part 4 of 5 appeared first on Sensei Victoria Whitfield.

Tired of being the only one actually getting things done?

Have you noticed that this is a pattern in your life, of being the responsible "finisher"?

Ever wonder why this keeps happening over and over again?

I have to be the one to break it to you, so that you can have your breakthrough: it’s not “them” or everybody else being lazy, it’s You.

The good news is, we’re going to spend the rest of the month shifting this, together.

Watch this weeks 9-minute Love Letter video, the first of a five-week series on “From Me to We Mindset”, to begin learning how to get out of your own way and stepping into exponential growth and impact.

"I'm so busy, I just can't take it anymore."

I'm excited to announce to you that we're beginning a new four-week series on From Me to We, the transition to living a tribal, cooperate lifestyle. So if you're watching this right now, stay tuned.

Make sure that you are getting these first, every single week, because this series is going to be absolutely transformational. Why? Because it's time for you to step into your calling.

This month, this time, this week, this day, in particular, you are going to learn exactly how to step into your calling in a way that leverages your unique brilliance and really optimizes the resources that you have gathered around you already.

We're gonna go through the exactly how, but you know me, if you've been following these Love Letters for a while now, you'll understand that we begin with the why.

Why is it time to transition from me to we? Well, I bet you could fill in the blank, but what my guides told me to tell you is that you are called to exponential growth this year.

You are called to exponential growth this year. Go ahead, type that in the comments below. Share that.

That's the notice for this week. Tweet it out, right? Put a blocky thing on Instagram. Let the world know that you are called to exponential growth this year.

The only thing that is standing between you and exponentiating your impact, exponentiating your income, and exponentiating your sense of wellness and sense of fulfillment in life is your mindset.

Know this: You are being called to exponential impact.

The main issue with your mindset is we have a me, I mindset that is dominating your life and your business, your career, if you don't have a business just yet, right?

So be kind to yourself. If you have the whole strong, independent insert here, right, I'm not just talking to the woman now. Come on, guys, right?

I know I have all the colors and fluffy things here, it's very feminine, and men understand these issues too. Shout out to all my guys who receive my Love Letters. Mwah. You guys rock.

But be kind to yourself. If you're the only one doing things, and you're getting frustrated because your plate goes from crickets empty, to, oh my God, I can't take it anymore full, back and forth, and back and forth, and back and forth, and back and forth.

I can barely even say that 'cause I'm so out of alignment with it. I understand where you're coming from. I've been working tooth and nail, right, with my intuitive healers, right, and my mentors, my team, to help me to wrench out of the, I do everything mindset, so that we can take this on an exponential weave.

But this month, in particular, I'm gonna start sharing what the guides have been sharing with me about how we can transition from me to we.

Or as I think of one of my private clients who is an amazing salon owner. She just inspires other salon owners from all over. We had this conversation around moving from the technician to the teacher, right? From technician to even leadership where we're so detailed and well-trained on exactly how to do the things, that we are driven to go and do the things. On a good day, maybe you could cut 10 heads of hair, but what if you have 100 walk-ins? It's time to transition from me to we. We're gonna be doing that this month because you are called to exponential growth.

Now, I'm hearing the oracle cards for the month calling in the energy. Let me come in a wee bit closer. Life purpose. Oracle cards deck by Doreen Virtue is who we're going to be journeying with all month.

Angels, what do we need to know about why it's time to transition from the me mindset to the we mindset? Let's see. Hmm. Career change. You're embarking upon a career that brings you the joy and abundance you desire and deserve. Oh my. That's a doozy. Couldn't have said it better myself.

It's more important now than ever for you to shift your mindset because you are stepping into receiving the joy and abundance that you deserve, right? Once you are open to receiving and being cooperative and collaborative, you can enjoy that abundance that you've visualized having and, no, it's not selfish to desire that because abundance, by the way, is just a reflection of how much impact you're having, right?

No shame in that.

It's also time for you to enjoy the journey. Enjoy the journey there. You don't have to be the hard work hero. We'll talk about that later this month, but that's not something that's going to win you a medal in war, or something. It's time for a career change.

Even if you're keeping the same business, and the same job, the light is going to turn on up top, right? You see the lighthouse? That is going to be you. There's even an angel in there. Check it out. Good stuff, right?

So let's turn on this month together. What's coming up for you hearing all that? That's it for this weeks' reading. Go ahead and comment below, right? Send me an email back, describe what's coming up for you.

Remember if there's any way that I can help you balance your mind, body and business, just let me know!

We'll see you next time.

(Original post 04/30/2018)

VictoriaWhitfield.com

Facebook.com/SenseiVictoriaWhitfield

-

Just for Today...

Be on the lookout to see if you’re the only one getting things done that are impactful.

And if that’s true, ask yourself how can I shift from a Me mindset to a We mindset so I can increase my impact?

Notice how you feel at that moment - you're already healing!

-

SHARE THIS! You’d be surprised how many people you know right now are in desperate need of healing and could use this information to change their life. If you can read this, you know someone who needs this Love Letter!

Want spiritual support on your healing journey but don't know where to start? Let's work #together!

Click the pink button below to take your Abundance Energy Jumpstart Assessment with Victoria and jumpstart your healing journey, today! 

The post Love Letters | From Me to We Mindset – Part 1 of 4 appeared first on Sensei Victoria Whitfield.