Tired of keeping up with the Joneses?

Wish you could just be yourself with people, but are too scared of what they'll think?

Hiding your pain and exhaustion behind your smile more than you'd like to admit?

Popular culture and educational systems teach us that it's our level of performance that determines our worth.

Unfortunately, living a life of high-performance doesn't lead to self-acceptance and fulfillment; instead, quite the opposite happens.

Watch this week's 10-minute Love Letter video to explore why we overperform so much, and how you can start to break free from this vicious cycle!

"I am so drained. I feel like everything is falling apart."

This week, Source has got two words for you.

Stop performing. Stop it. This is not a performance. You're not putting on a show. Your life is meant to be lived authentically, okay?

Let's get into this. When we are performing, we feel like we're pushing to get others' approval, or pushing to be productive, or pushing to get recognition, or pushing to be accepted, or we're trying to be good, or we're trying to be healthy, or we're trying to make everyone feel comfortable. There's this sense of artifice, and energy that's expounded, and really shoved out of us, this performance. It's go time.

Performance is really meant for spurts. It's not meant to be a lifestyle. 

I'm telling you, who's watching right now, you've created a lifestyle of performing:

• You perform for your kids, as mother.
• You perform for your clients.
• You perform for your boss, as star employee.
• You perform for your parents as the perfect son.
• You perform for your community as the perfect person, or the best, the go-to guy.
• As grandma, you're just always there, filling this role that either you've created for yourself, that you have to live up to, or it's been placed upon you.

Oh, you're really good at this. Let's put you on this pedestal, so that you have to always operate at that level.

I'm vibing very specific with you right now. I feel it very strongly, of how tired you are performing, performing, performing, trying to be someone that at the end of the day, you're just drained, pushing at that level, or really trying to make something work that is falling apart.

Maybe you're trying to make it work, and you're the only one trying to make it work, and putting on a happy face for others, so that no one knows all of the pain that is behind that performance mask, that has become your face.

There's so much more for you. Beaming love and acceptance at you. And this week in particular, we have to accept who we are, is what Source is saying, specifically by stopping the performance.

Know this: Worry will die when you increase your faith. Go for it this week and trust yourself! @SenseiWhitfield

Performance is over. Curtain call. Yay. Everyone's clapping. Okay, you're done. What happens?

I'm starting to hear the oracle cards calling in the energy about who are you when you're not performing?

This is a journaling. This is a conversation having kind of topic. This is not one specific, one love letter, and you're going to figure this one all out. No.

This is a journey in and of itself, finding out, who are you when you're not performing, into the role, or the mask, right, that you've created for yourself, or that you've inherited.

The Oracle Cards that want to weigh on this, so who are you when you're not performing is the life purpose oracle cards deck by Doreen Virtue.

Can you even imagine? Angels, help us imagine, who are we when we stop performing, and really start stepping into being authentic?

Maybe at work, maybe even in our homes, and our private lives, who are we? Hmm.

School. The answer that you're seeking involves going to school, and this is where we're going to leave off this week in particular.

This is about learning more about yourself, so perhaps you are currently in school right now, or you've been to school in the past, you've studied before, majored in a certain area, or have had certifications in a certain area.

Look to what inspires you the most in your self education. At school, there are certain subjects that you vibrate with the most.

If you're currently in school, maybe art class is something that really just flows out of you. You don't have to perform when you're drawing. You're just in the moment, or writing, or theater, or perhaps in debate, you're just flowing. You don't even have to perform. It's just part of you. You love that intellectual stimulation, right, of debate, or history.

If you are not currently in school, what have you been looking at going back to school for recently?

What would you study simply for the love of it, where you know that at 3AM, if you had to do a project for that specific field of study, you'd be over the moon. "Oh, my gosh. I would love to be up at 3AM writing about this, or studying and practicing for this."

The guides are pushing you towards education to really help you see, who are you when you're not performing?

It's a bit ironic, because we tend to associate school with performance, right? If you get an A, then you're acceptable. A does not mean acceptable. Wrong, so if that's what's coming up for you, by the way, if you're watching, let that one go.

Instead, what would you study simply for the love of it, if there was no grade, if you were just in school for the love of it?

For me, it's meditation and Reiki, world religions, parapsychology, metaphysics, manifestation, and all of that yummy, juice, vortex-y goodness. Right? That's who I am when I'm not performing, and I happen to have integrated that personally into my work. What is it for you? Look to your education.

Post below in the comments. Let me know, what do you find out? What would you study for the love of it? What are you doing in your free time, and studying in your free time, Googling constantly about? That might be a clue as to who you are when you're not performing. I'm here for you.

Contact me if you want to set up a session, so that we can clarify that. I do hour long sessions, as well as half hour sessions on a regular basis, because having regular accountability makes all the difference, okay?

Make sure that you subscribe on YouTube, so that you get your love letters first every week, and we will see you next time!

In Love and Light,

Victoria.

VictoriaWhitfield.com
Facebook.com/SenseiVictoriaWhitfield

Just for Today...

Make time to get clarity: journal about what you do simply for the love and pleasure of it, especially listing things that no one knows.

Then write down how it feels when you're doing these things, versus when you feel like you're performing or trying to appease others.

SHARE THIS! You’d be surprised how many people you know right now are in desperate need of healing and could use this information to change their life. If you can read this, you know someone who needs this Love Letter!

Want spiritual support on your healing journey but don't know where to start? Tell me!

Click the grey button below to book your complimentary 30-minute Share Your Story Call  to start your healing journey, today!

The post Love Letters | Stop Performing appeared first on Sensei Victoria Whitfield.

Tired of keeping up with the Joneses?

Wish you could just be yourself with people, but are too scared of what they'll think?

Hiding your pain and exhaustion behind your smile more than you'd like to admit?

Popular culture and educational systems teach us that it's our level of performance that determines our worth.

Unfortunately, living a life of high-performance doesn't lead to self-acceptance and fulfillment; instead, quite the opposite happens.

Watch this week's 10-minute Love Letter video to explore why we overperform so much, and how you can start to break free from this vicious cycle!

"I am so drained. I feel like everything is falling apart."

This week, Source has got two words for you.

Stop performing. Stop it. This is not a performance. You're not putting on a show. Your life is meant to be lived authentically, okay?

Let's get into this. When we are performing, we feel like we're pushing to get others' approval, or pushing to be productive, or pushing to get recognition, or pushing to be accepted, or we're trying to be good, or we're trying to be healthy, or we're trying to make everyone feel comfortable. There's this sense of artifice, and energy that's expounded, and really shoved out of us, this performance. It's go time.

Performance is really meant for spurts. It's not meant to be a lifestyle. 

I'm telling you, who's watching right now, you've created a lifestyle of performing:

• • You perform for your kids, as mother.

• • You perform for your clients.

• • You perform for your boss, as star employee.

• • You perform for your parents as the perfect son.

• • You perform for your community as the perfect person, or the best, the go-to guy.

• As grandma, you're just always there, filling this role that either you've created for yourself, that you have to live up to, or it's been placed upon you.

Oh, you're really good at this. Let's put you on this pedestal, so that you have to always operate at that level.

I'm vibing very specific with you right now. I feel it very strongly, of how tired you are performing, performing, performing, trying to be someone that at the end of the day, you're just drained, pushing at that level, or really trying to make something work that is falling apart.

Maybe you're trying to make it work, and you're the only one trying to make it work, and putting on a happy face for others, so that no one knows all of the pain that is behind that performance mask, that has become your face.

There's so much more for you. Beaming love and acceptance at you. And this week in particular, we have to accept who we are, is what Source is saying, specifically by stopping the performance.

Know this: Know this: Self-acceptance starts where performing ends. #loveyourself @SenseiWhitfield http://bit.ly/295Gf4K

Performance is over. Curtain call. Yay. Everyone's clapping. Okay, you're done. What happens?

I'm starting to hear the oracle cards calling in the energy about who are you when you're not performing?

This is a journaling. This is a conversation having kind of topic. This is not one specific, one love letter, and you're going to figure this one all out. No.

This is a journey in and of itself, finding out, who are you when you're not performing, into the role, or the mask, right, that you've created for yourself, or that you've inherited.

The Oracle Cards that want to weigh on this, so who are you when you're not performing is the life purpose oracle cards deck by Doreen Virtue.

Can you even imagine? Angels, help us imagine, who are we when we stop performing, and really start stepping into being authentic?

Maybe at work, maybe even in our homes, and our private lives, who are we? Hmm.

School. The answer that you're seeking involves going to school, and this is where we're going to leave off this week in particular.

This is about learning more about yourself, so perhaps you are currently in school right now, or you've been to school in the past, you've studied before, majored in a certain area, or have had certifications in a certain area.

Look to what inspires you the most in your self education. At school, there are certain subjects that you vibrate with the most.

If you're currently in school, maybe art class is something that really just flows out of you. You don't have to perform when you're drawing. You're just in the moment, or writing, or theater, or perhaps in debate, you're just flowing. You don't even have to perform. It's just part of you. You love that intellectual stimulation, right, of debate, or history.

If you are not currently in school, what have you been looking at going back to school for recently?

What would you study simply for the love of it, where you know that at 3AM, if you had to do a project for that specific field of study, you'd be over the moon. "Oh, my gosh. I would love to be up at 3AM writing about this, or studying and practicing for this."

The guides are pushing you towards education to really help you see, who are you when you're not performing?

It's a bit ironic, because we tend to associate school with performance, right? If you get an A, then you're acceptable. A does not mean acceptable. Wrong, so if that's what's coming up for you, by the way, if you're watching, let that one go.

Instead, what would you study simply for the love of it, if there was no grade, if you were just in school for the love of it?

For me, it's meditation and Reiki, world religions, parapsychology, metaphysics, manifestation, and all of that yummy, juice, vortex-y goodness. Right? That's who I am when I'm not performing, and I happen to have integrated that personally into my work. What is it for you? Look to your education.

Post below in the comments. Let me know, what do you find out? What would you study for the love of it? What are you doing in your free time, and studying in your free time, Googling constantly about? That might be a clue as to who you are when you're not performing. I'm here for you.

Contact me if you want to set up a session, so that we can clarify that. I do hour long sessions, as well as half hour sessions on a regular basis, because having regular accountability makes all the difference, okay?

Make sure that you subscribe on YouTube, so that you get your love letters first every week, and we will see you next time!

In Love and Light,

Victoria.

VictoriaWhitfield.com
Facebook.com/SenseiVictoriaWhitfield

Just for Today...

Make time to get clarity: journal about what you do simply for the love and pleasure of it, especially listing things that no one knows.

Then write down how it feels when you're doing these things, versus when you feel like you're performing or trying to appease others.

Notice how you feel at that moment - you're already healing!

SHARE THIS! You’d be surprised how many people you know right now are in desperate need of healing and could use this information to change their life. If you can read this, you know someone who needs this Love Letter!

Want spiritual support on your healing journey but don't know where to start? Tell me!

Give us a call at +1 (732) 903-8573 or click on the blue BOOK NOW button to start your healing journey, today!

The post Love Letters | Stop Performing appeared first on Sensei Victoria Whitfield.

Feeling lonely lately?

Frustrated because you feel alone in your problems?

Longing for more love and companionship?

Loneliness can actually be a Dark Gift from Spirit. A "Dark Gift" means the gift of learning and mindset shifts that come only through trials and experiencing difficulty.

The feelings you have are in your heart for a reason, and loneliness--once you understand it--is meant to heal your life.

Watch the above video to learn how to find greater love in your loneliness!

"Negative emotions like loneliness, envy and guilt have an important role to play in a happy life; they're big, flashing signs that something needs to change." - Gretchen Rubin, The Happiness Project

Pause for a moment.

Close your eyes, and feel into any loneliness you may be feeling or still holding in your spirit right now. Notice what it feels like...

Perhaps you feel an ache or gaping dark hole in your throat, chest or belly?

That's because loneliness affects the middle chakras: the throat, heart, solar plexus and sacral. And these are all chakras that govern our relationships and social connections in this lifetime.

Close your eyes and re-experience that feeling again, paying attention to your body.

Where it is can tell you which chakra's issues and lessons are involved in healing your loneliness.

Why are we feeling into our loneliness? Because everything happens for a reason.

Spirit is sending you this deep ache on purpose, to guide you where in your life you can heal your relationships and take your energy and personal power to another dimension of health and expression.

Be kind to yourself though, if you can't feel where it is. All issues in loneliness have one origin though...

Your Inner Child.

When we are feeling lonely, the sacred energy of innocence, vulnerability and infinite possibility called our Inner Child is battling feelings of abandonment and neglect.

Intimately tied to your Subconscious Mind, the Inner Child in her infinite, wild and irrational power remembers everything.

She remembers learning to be independent, and she remembers how she interpreted that as being abandoned and neglected. Worse yet, if she was abandoned and neglected in this lifetime, the expectation of that abuse and deep emotional ache is even stronger.

Take a deep breath in. Be kind to her.

Because it's just an interpretation; loneliness is a subjective interpretation of reality in which you have decided to see yourself as alone.

Maybe you've been profoundly disappointed, disenfranchised, disempowered. Maybe you've been forgotten by someone you expected to acknowledge you, or your efforts and feelings have gone chronically unrecognized.

Yes, this is all painful, and all can justify the choice to see yourself as alone, ostracized, set apart or not included.

But, in spiritual truth, it is actually impossible for you to be alone.

There is so much love and support around you in the energy--the ancestors flowing through your bloodline, fairies and nature spirits surrounding you on Earth, the gift of air and breath, and that constant, still and small voice that speaks love to you when the mean girl in your head screams and kicks against your greater good.

Know this: Tell your Inner Child: "You are not alone. You are loved right now." #BK2YS #TRIBE

The angels are with you. Your loved ones--human, animal, plant, stone, etc.--are with you. Your spirit guides and power animals are with you. Source is with you. Nature is you.

But all of the above don't mean anything if you choose to believe you are alone.

You see, to find love in your loneliness, the first step is being willing to believe that you are not alone.

The father of positive thought, Napoleon Hill once said that "whatever you can conceive and believe you can achieve." What matters most is that you change your mind to believe that it's impossible to be alone because Spirit is always with you.

What comes next then is the purpose of feeling of loneliness: when you feel it, it means you are being called to greater love ASAP.

The deep ache that we feel in loneliness is a warning sign that we are choosing to feel disconnected from Spirit. It's meant to be uncomfortable, because it's a motivator.

But what are we supposed to do to heed the guidance and heal this feeling? Get out and share more love ASAP with as many people as you can; one way to lose the ache of loneliness is to be of greater service, and volunteering is powerful medicine for that!

Watch this week's video for the Oracle Card of the Week, which shows us how to create peace and serenity through our loneliness!

In Love and Light,

Victoria.

VictoriaWhitfield.com
Facebook.com/SenseiVictoriaWhitfield

Just for Today...

Take your loneliness as a cue from Spirit to GIVE more Love.

Push yourself to get up, get out of the house and volunteer. Open up VolunteerMatch.org and register for an opportunity that speaks to your heart.

Notice how you feel at that moment - you're already healing!

SHARE THIS! You’d be surprised how many people you know right now are in desperate need of healing and could use this information to change their life. If you can read this, you know someone who needs this Love Letter!

Want to shift your loneliness to greater love? Tell me!

Give me a call at 732-903-8573 or click on the blue BOOK NOW button to start your healing journey, today!

The post Love Letters | Finding The Love in Your Loneliness appeared first on Sensei Victoria Whitfield.

Awww... The holidays are the times when we come together as friends and family and do two things:

• Stuff ourselves sick with sugary, fatty and greasy food.
• Whine and get into fights because now's our chance!

Right? EW! I wish I could be warm and fuzzy, but for some of us the holidays and celebration gatherings of any kind are a hot mess.

Let's face the problem head on, rather than just dreading and building up our anxiety and blood pressure leading up to the event - or even using drinking more wine or stuffing with more food or watching a TV or whatever to distract us during the party.

Gatherings are powerful energywork, and when used correctly, you can exponentially increase your vibration and even increase your manifestation techniques. But that has to be on the agenda in order for that to happen!

In the previous post, I gave 7 Strategies for Not Getting Stuffed at Holiday Gatherings. This post will continue the healing process by showing you other awesome things you can do that do NOT involve stuffing yourself, but DO involve experiencing more love and more connection. Group hug!

And that's what we really want during the holidays, right?

So here goes:

1. Looking through photo albums and telling the stories of each picture. (Can also be showing cellphone pictures, but only if you know how to put the phone down and pay attention to people!)
2. Writing "Thank You" or "Happy Holidays" cards to your list of people that you are grateful for as a group and having a "card party."
3. Taking pictures as a family (professional ones are nice, but also doing disposable ones too are fun because it's a surprise! and the candids are much more emotionally satisfying to look at)
4. Writing "Happy Holidays" or  "Thank You" or "Wish You Well" notes to your neighbors AND walking them to their mailboxes to put in. BONUS: knocking on their door and saying to their face that you wish them and their family health and happiness in person
5. Starting your own dance party. BONUS: having a dance battle or Soul Train Line
6. Having a sing along or jam session
7. Playing silly old games like Telephone, Mad Libs, Charades, Taboo, Jenga, Simon Says, Red Light Green Light or Marry Kiss Kill
8. Calling people and telling them you love them or that you were just thinking of them and wish them well as a group
9. Planning your next vacation as a group
10. Watch an old home movie
11. Watch your favorite comedy movie (skip the food or alcohol or sugary drinks and have Tea instead. pretend you're british!)
12. Pick a charity to donate to like Heifer International or The Unstoppable Foundation
13. Rather than going around the table and saying what you are thankful for, go around the table and have Rampages of Appreciation for each other (and loved ones who are more than alive) where you say what you love about each person there
14. Have everyone tell stories about your ancestors' accomplishments and the stories of your family's heritage
15. Do a group verbal vision board and brainstorm, going around the room saying "wouldn't it be cool if we did..." and then the next person builds on that saying "yeah and wouldn't it be even better if we did..."
16. Go around the group and say what's your New Year's Resolution or a big goal you're working toward
17. Increase you Law of Attraction energy by everyone saying what they want more of (affection, appreciation, health, a new job, etc) Ask and ye shall receive!
18. Also go around the group and say what you may need help with or are working on to make it a group mastermind
19. Raise your vibration by going around the group and each person recounting all the accomplishments you've made in the last week, month, quarter and/or year, and then make sure everyone in the group claps loudly and celebrates. What you celebrate, you attract more of!
20. Have a car trunk treasure hunt where you have a list of items that everyone needs to find in their trunk, and whoever finds the most items on the list, wins
21. Have a clothing donation competition where you fill garbage bags of clothes you want to donate and whoever has the most clothes, wins
22. Go for a group walk around the block or in a local park to appreciate nature if the weather permits, or even plant a tree as a group to commemorate the day
23. Visit and clean a family gravesite as a group and remember the love that family member brought into your lives
24. Call or visit people who are in the hospital, in jail or are abroad and let them know you care and are thinking of them as a group
25. Do a group doodle mural where everyone draws and writes on a big piece of paper to commemorate the day
26. Go around the group and say where you want to be in 5 years and where you want to see the family / your friends / your company in 5 years
27. Go around the group and have everyone say their birthdate, astrological sign, favorite color, favorite food, and what was the most fun they ever had or the craziest/funniest thing they ever did/heard/saw

There you have it! 27 ways to celebrate and enjoy the love and communal energy of group gatherings.

Did you come up with more ways that aren't listed here? Leave a comment below and share the ideas so we can all learn to live more love-filled and quality lives with the people we care about!

SHARE THIS! You'd be surprised how many people you know right now are in desperate need of healing and could use this information to change their life. If you can read this, you know someone who needs this Love Letter!

The post 27 Non-Food Love and Bliss Raising Activities for Holiday Gatherings appeared first on Sensei Victoria Whitfield.

Hello my loves!

It's the holiday season again and you know what that means - FOOD!

So I just want to take a moment and write to you about Thanksgiving; whether or not you celebrate it, the emotionally-charged energy of food and binging is very strong now - it's just plain hard to avoid.

Thanksgiving is never just a little food, it's an explosion of fatty, salty, sugary, heavy comfort foods. But also, it's a time for family, friends, vacation and relaxation - or on the flipside, it's a time for confrontation and arguments, long lines at the stores, crazy traffic and good ol' fashioned STRESS. 🙂 Sound familiar? Painful, right? Ugh.

Yeah.

I have to say, this is a strange holiday. We all force ourselves to sit around a table and gorge past the point of exhaustion, usually on "comfort foods" to feel all warm and cozy - very few of us health nuts will binge on just healthy foods. Either way, there is this sense of a ritual saturnalian "stuffing" that has been attached to the holiday.

My question is this, though: why does being thankful and appreciating all the blessings or wonderful people in our lives have to equate to stuffing our face, our stomachs and our colons dangerously full of food?

Well, I received an unexpected answer from Spirit just now as I'm writing this...

It's because we equate food with Love.

And we all need Love, in fact, we crave it.

Especially this time of year. The weather is getting colder, most businesses and schools are in full tilt, pushing for the end of year deadlines, and also, the holidays remind us the most of relationships - loved ones we've lost, draining partnerships, or the pain of loneliness.

But what happened? Why do we equate food with Love?

The Energy is telling me it's for several reasons:

• The act of eating is sensually pleasing - taste, texture, smell, sound, looks. It appeals to and massages all 5 senses
• As children, our parents often rewarded us with ice cream, sweets or some other tasty treat
• Because cooking is an Art, we associate certain dishes with our loved ones as their Artwork, so preparing and eating the dish invokes that person's energy
• Social conventions of giving food to show one cares - Valentine's Day chocolates, soup for the grieving, etc.
• And last, but not least, food is understood to be one of the basic, primal human needs for physiological function and survival

Ok, that's nice so why do we gorge and binge on food, and how can we break free of this cycle?

Well, this question and others are the exact things that this month's retreat at the dojo will be about:

Food Energywork: Enlightened Eating for Empaths

Sunday, November 23rd

10:00am - 3:00pm

• Topics Covered at this Retreat:
• Sacred Body Image
• The Healing Purpose of Fat
• Emotional Un-Stuffing
• Empathic Decision-Making Technique
• Food Feng Shui
• And More!

Click on the red button below for a full description and to reserve your spot at the retreat.

EARLYBIRD DISCOUNT: Register by 11:59pm this Sunday and save $100 off admission!

See you there,

Victoria

Sensei Victoria Whitfield is a holistic stress management expert; she teaches emotionally overwhelmed professionals how to continue to serve the people they need to while taking care of themselves, first. A Certified Master-Teacher of Usui-Tibetan Reiki and Holy Fire Karuna Reiki, she regularly teaches Reiki and Meditation classes at her private dojo space in Westfield, NJ. Like her on Facebook.com/SenseiVictoriaWhitfield and follow on Instagram @senseiwhitfield

The post Happy Thanksgiving Binge! appeared first on Sensei Victoria Whitfield.