team Archives - Sensei Victoria Whitfield

Love Letters | VulnerAble Leadership – Part 5 of 5

Sensei Victoria Whitfield — Mon, 28 Sep 2020 05:00:43 +0000

This is the fifth and final week of our exploration of vulnerability, cultivating our relationship with being vulnerable and improving our ability to engage and open up in a positive way, maybe for the first time.

Now if this is the first video that you're seeing in this series, make sure that you hit pause, go back on my blog at VictoriaWhitfield.com and start from part one, so that you are grounded in this process. Without further ado, this week in particular for the fifth and final week of our discussion on vulnerability, my spirit guides have asked us to discuss vulnerable leadership.

Last week, we talked about the power of opening up as an empath to being vulnerable, so that we can better relate to and interact with the people and things that we care about in this lifetime. We talked about respecting our energy as empaths, but also not letting our sensitivity dominate us in this lifetime – claiming that as a power, rather than a disability – or be something that you're constantly afraid of or overly protecting yourself from. This week, however, we're going even farther into vulnerability as a power and applying it to leadership.

A wonderful role model of vulnerable leadership and someone who's a thought leader in this area, two people actually, I would have to say one is Simon Sinek and the other is Brene Brown. If you have not checked out their work, I highly recommend it. They have amazing, inspiring, empowering things to share with you around vulnerable leadership and how healing it is especially in the professional world.

The most painful thing that I've seen is how insensitive leadership destroys powerful teams that have become like family and overcome the most incredible odds together. These things that come from the top-down in corporate – restructuring, or layoffs, or whatever hot word they use to explain being insensitive to the needs and the preciousness of the relationships of the people that are working under them – it's incredible how destructive they can be.

I grew up watching my mother re-enter the workforce after 17 years as a homemaker to work for a certain corporation as a technical writer, and then a web developer, and coder for over 20 years. I remember as a kid going to their picnics and things and seeing all of these people that she worked with like my extended family, and feeling part of something bigger; seeing them laughing, and supporting one another. ...Then I also lived through, as a young woman, watching them be torn apart, seeing the stress, and the pain of those wonderful relationships being just torn apart, torn apart by restructuring or “re-orgs” as the company would say. I'm not going to say what company because I want to respect privacy here.

Maybe you've seen this happen in your family – your work family – or your corporation as well, this being torn apart by insensitive leadership, putting numbers before people, or putting self-protection first, which is something that we hinted at last week. Let's go into it this time for our final discussion: the toxic effects of putting self-protection before serving their community around us.

We can get protection-obsessed especially in the professional world because for some reason we allow money and numbers to make us paranoid and prioritize dollars and quotas, and metrics above people, relationships, health and mutual human respect. Be kind to yourself if this is something that you've witnessed happening and that you don't want to be a part of any longer. If only just for today, commit to being open as a leader. Commit to developing your ability to be vulnerable along with the people who you are leading.

Simon Sinek gives us a wonderful example of how to measure how open-hearted you are as a leader. Leaders, he says, are people who watch out for the people to the right and to the left of them. That is it. It has nothing to do with titles, what's on your business card, or what your website says, or how big your office is, or how big your bank account is, or not. It's who are you being on a moment-to-moment basis. In order to look out for, to take care of, the people to the left and to the right of you, you've got to be open to what's going on with them, rather than just what's going on with “Me” and making sure that I'm getting x, y, z done, and so on.

It is a mental acrobatic that you do at first to decide, “I'm going to be concerned, and open, and curious, and communicative with the people that are to the left and to the right of me. The people that are supporting me, I am going to support them. I'm going to be open to how do they feel right now. I'm going to ask them, ‘how are you feeling? Are you all right?’ and loving and supporting them in that.”

Coming from a space of your own center of love and support and not forgetting that you as a leader have needs and have feelings is also important, which is something that we also discussed last week, opening to the fact that I have feelings, too, as an Empath. As someone who supports others, I have feelings. I have needs, and they have got to be honored and respected by me first and then also the people that I'm sharing this life experience with.

Be kind to yourself if in trying to be a vulnerable leader, meaning someone who is present to and caring for the people who are in your care, you've sacrificed your own self-care. That is negative vulnerable leadership because it leaves you open to health problems, relationship problems, spiritual and emotion oppression, depression. Be kind to yourself. That leaves you negatively vulnerable.

How can we then as leaders, moreover as Healing Leaders (that's my term) on this planet, how can we open up to leading from the heart, leading with courage, and positive vulnerability? I’m curious, what does that look like? Positive, vulnerable leadership, is healing leadership. I would venture that it starts with healing self, first, and staying open to being present to those that are in our care, who are supporting us, who are following us, and share the same beliefs and vision that we have. We're all working together in one direction. At the same time, there's the person out in front who holds the vision, being the Visionary. --

Click to share the Tweet of the Week:

Know this: Be kind to yourself if in trying to be a vulnerable leader, meaning someone who is present to and caring for the people who are in your care, you've sacrificed your own self-care. #empath #entrepreneur #workaholic @SenseiWhitfield

-- Are you loving The Love Letters? If so, please support our healing work with a love donation: --

Are you healing? Are you present to yourself? Okay, if you are, you're doing your self-care, you're doing your spiritual nourishment, your physical nourishment and love. Good. And are you present to the people around you needing the same, just as much love, and approval, and support, and honor as you're showing yourself? Are they also learning how to do that for the people behind them as well?

Be a Healing Leader. It entails being open to being vulnerable, cultivating that ability to be vulnerable, but if only just for today, commit to being a healing leader by opening to being vulnerable in a positive and empowering way.

I'm hearing the Oracle cards like, "Hey, pick us!" It's Healing with the Angels oracle cards deck by Doreen Virtue, her very first oracle cards deck that she ever made in her career. Angels, what do we need to know right now about stepping into healing leadership by embodying being positive, vulnerable leaders? ...This is so good, like I could literally do an entire summit on this, “listening.” Listening! This is so perfect. I love that in the picture, she's listening to her angels, and her angels are listening to her. I'm going to read, I don't really have to, but before I read I just want to tell you what I'm hearing from my spirit guides around listening.

The most powerful leaders I've ever followed in my own life have been profound listeners, profound. Having the courage to listen to your people as a leader is essential. God, She gave us two ears and one mouth. We've got to listen twice as much as we give directions and directives. Anyway, let’s start listening. Let me read:

Listening. You are in communication with your angels and the messages that you are receiving are very real indeed. Trust them. This card is a validation from your angels that you really are hearing them. You have been receiving repetitive messages through your feelings, dreams, visions, inner voice, or knowingness. Are you listening and trusting these messages? Are you following them? If you get an inclination to call someone, go somewhere, or read something, it's important to follow this guidance. By drawing this card, your angels ask you to give all your doubts or worries about divine guidance to them. Know that you truly are communicating with heaven and enjoy the conversations.

This is so perfect. Here's where we'll leave off for this entire series: Cultivating your listening sense. Your active listening is also cultivating positive vulnerability. If you are not comfortable listening to others, or you feel impatient, it's just because you haven't cultivated listening as a skill. It's just a skill that you're a little bit deficient in. If you just dedicate time and mental space to it, it gets easier and more pleasurable with time.

If you need to work on your listening skills, I highly recommend my book Natural Intuition Now. I take you step by step exactly through how to listen with presence and also why it is so important. The more that we become intuitive, open, vulnerable, healing and empowered leaders, the better our world becomes, the better the legacy of love becomes that we leave behind us in all the work that we do and all the people, all the lives that we touch.

Send me an email back at team@victoriawhitfiled.com. What's coming up for you around this? Make sure you subscribe on YouTube, so that you get Love Letters first every single week. Tag someone who needs to hear this, and I will see you in the next one.

May you feel loved and safe to be your most brilliant self at work.

Please, enjoy the journey. Muah. See you soon. --

Just for today...

Challenge yourself to actively listen twice as much as you speak, when in conversations and meetings.

Listen to your body, your feelings, others’ bodies and feelings, and shine the light of your attention on the things left unsaid by all involved in the conversation (yourself included).

Notice how you feel in that moment - you're already healing!

-- Hello there. I am Sensei Victoria Whitfield, your business reiki master. And it's my joy to get to support empathic entrepreneurs and business owners like you in getting and staying grounded and clear in mind, body and business. Welcome back to another installment of your weekly love letter from the dojo at naturalintuition.com and victoriawhitfield.com, my blog. These are your sources for channeled holistic stress management techniques and guidance for developing your natural intuition. Whether you're looking to improve the quality of your personal and professional life, let this love letter be your reminder that you are not alone and that together we can make that happen.

Let's schedule a chat, and see how I can help you...

The post Love Letters | VulnerAble Leadership – Part 5 of 5 appeared first on Sensei Victoria Whitfield.

Love Letters | The DIY Trap – Part 2 of 5

Sensei Victoria Whitfield — Mon, 09 Sep 2019 05:00:43 +0000

Are you a D.I.Y. junkie?

Do you love being independent and in control of everything?

Yet, are you frustrated that you can’t seem to attract or retain a good support team?

Society endorses is being “strong, independent wo/men” constantly.

However there comes a point where D.I.Y. starts to feel exhausting and small.

Watch this week’s 11-minute Love Letter video, the second in our 5-week series on From Me to We, to free yourself from the “DIY Trap”!

"I'd rather just do it myself."

Last week, we introduced this concept and we talked about how now more than ever you are being called to exponential growth. This week in particular, we're going to talk about the DIY trap.

The DIY trap is do it yourself, for those of you who are not exactly sure like "What do you mean by DIY?" It's do it yourself. Where you get the program for example that's discounted because it's the DIY version. Or, you're going to start your business and you're going to do it yourself.

Or you're being a strong, independent insert thing here, deja vu, no? Being a strong, independent woman. Strong, independent man. You're going to do it yourself.

This is an ego trap that Guides want you to know this week in particular, it's time for you to get off that hamster wheel of DIY. There's an even higher vibration, one that works even better, and it's even more satisfying than DIY. We'll get to that in a minute, but let's clarify a little bit more of what's going on when we're pulled into doing another do it yourself project professionally especially.

Maybe you have to type that email, or maybe you have to do the phone call. There's the impatient controller that comes out of all of us. I know you, I know you. If you have achiever, A for achiever, in your StrengthsFinder like I do, I'm relator, empathy, strategic, achiever, adaptability for those of you taking the StrengthsFinder test.

If you have achiever in your strengths, you're wired for being the controller. You got to go and achieve and implement and achieve with love. This is how we generate safety in a world that has shown herself to be a very scary place. I'm talking going all the way back to say childhood, adolescence, where a negative experience caused you to have a loss of control, or to feel, or perceive loss of control.

It's very painful to go through those experiences, I understand that. In order to bring order back into a chaotic world that seem to be spinning out of control, maybe you had an angry parent, maybe you had an alcoholic, maybe someone attacked you, maybe all of the above. Other things, someone died, someone appeared ... be kind to yourself.

If you took control, you did it yourself in order to create a sense of control and certainty in life. This week in particular, this day in particular The Guides are calling you to a higher vibration because your next level imminent if you would just change your mindset from DIY to DIT, write this down.

No more DIY, from now on it's DIT, do it together. Do it together. If it's the email, if it's the phone call, if it's the sales visit, if it's the interview, if it's the dating, et cetera. Two heads are better than one, especially when they're on good, strong shoulders, not just any head, you know what I'm saying? Two strong, grounded, well-rounded, sensitive, spiritual heads are better than just one.

DIY may make you feel nice, and small, and in control, and everything certain, you know what to expect, but do you see how compressed I look? This is not a relaxed posture. When we go into DIT, doing it together, opening up to receiving input, support, and allowing for communal, cooperative manifestation, we have to open in order to receive that type of energy. Because of that expansiveness, we are able to move and receive more energy, more money, more clients, more love than ever before.

Think of it this way. God gave you two hands, or mother gave you two hands when you popped out of her womb. If you are seeing visions of receiving things that are larger than your two hands can hold, how is that going to happen? You're going to need more than just your own two hands to bring it in. That's where you're feeling like you're hitting that glass ceiling in life, that's why it's time to shift from DIY to DIT.

Know this: No more DIY! From now on, it’s DIT.

I'm hearing the oracle cards calling in the energy, so let me come a little closer. It's the Life Purpose Oracle Cards deck by Doreen Virtue. One of many Oracle Cards decks that we have here at The Dojo, always open to receiving donations.

Angels, let's hear it. What do we need to know right now about shifting our mindset from me to we and from DIY to DIT? What's coming up here?

Books. You connect to your life purpose through your involvement with books. This is interesting. There are a lot of do it yourself books out there, how to, advice guides. I love the idiot's guides because I don't care if you know how tell me how to do it, I'm interested.

My guides are bringing me to being part of a book. Not just writing your own book, I wrote my book, Natural Intuition Now, it's on Amazon. The way that I wrote it was actually by channeling. Channeling is a bit of a DIY, DIT kind of spliced interaction, where the wisdom was just flowing through me.

But, also my guides are bringing being part of a group that is writing a book. I want you, this week in particular, if you've been called to write, or you have a story to tell, go and seek out who else is talking about it, and see how you can get involved.

Also, this is for those of you, if you have that pile of books on your nightstand that you're not reading, it's because you've been DIY'ing that. Let's try DIT'ing your approach to reading these visionary books that you've accrued creating a book reading group, being the leader of it, yes, you. Not waiting for anyone else. Going to see who else would be interested in reading this book with you. That's what I do, by the way, on my Facebook page is I want to re-read Ask and It Is Given, so I'm doing it together with all the 1500 something people that are on Facebook with me. That way we're all going higher.

Go ahead and comment below, send me an email back what comes up for you around DIY to DIT transition this week.

Remember, if you could think of any way that I could help you in balancing your mind, body and business, just let me know over at victoriawhitfield.com/contact. I'll see you there. See you next week.

(Original post 05/07/2018)

VictoriaWhitfield.com

Facebook.com/SenseiVictoriaWhitfield

Just for Today...

Take stock of how many things you are convinced are “DIY” only.

Envision scenarios on how they can be done together with others.

Notice how you feel at that moment - you're already healing!

SHARE THIS! You’d be surprised how many people you know right now are in desperate need of healing and could use this information to change their life. If you can read this, you know someone who needs this Love Letter!

Want spiritual support on your healing journey but don't know where to start? Let's work #together!

Click the pink button below to take your Abundance Energy Jumpstart Assessment with Victoria and jumpstart your healing journey, today!

The post Love Letters | The DIY Trap – Part 2 of 5 appeared first on Sensei Victoria Whitfield.

Love Letters | It’s Not About You

Sensei Victoria Whitfield — Mon, 21 Aug 2017 12:00:16 +0000

Do you think that you're not good enough?

Thought that you'd be further ahead in life than you are right now?

Going through a difficult time of arguments and disagreements?

When the going gets tough, our knee-jerk reaction can often be to think "why me?" or "what's wrong with me?"

Believe it or not, no matter how ugly it gets, Source says you need to remember that it's not about "me", instead it's about "we".

Watch this week's 9-minute Love Letter video to find the courage to be compassionate!

"What is wrong with me?"

This week, you must know that it is not about you.

It's not about you. It never has been, it never will be, so from this point forward in time, you have got to stop taking it so seriously.

They told me, be more specific. You have got to stop taking him so seriously. You've got to stop taking her and what she does in her life and in her business, so personally, because it's not about you. It never has been, and it never will be.

Now perhaps someone has really been getting under your skin lately, or they've been throwing their anger your way, or getting very emotional, and clogging up your joy with all of their crusty crap.

Perhaps they talk stuff about you, or hating. (I don't really believe in hating.) But perhaps you feel like you may be getting hated on, or people writing smear stuff about you.

There's this insidious, internal, pre-programmed response that we have, unfortunately, to these interactions of:

"What did I do to deserve this?"
"What's wrong with me, that I can't get ahead, like so-and-so?"
"What's wrong with me, that I am not married, yet?"
"What's wrong with me, that I can't have kids?"
"What's wrong with me, that I'm not financially stable?"

Our ego turns us in on ourselves, because she's actually trying to protect you from stepping out when you're feeling vulnerable.

The reason why she brings you inward, blaming inward, "What's wrong with me? There's something wrong with me," taking everything outside of us, personally or very seriously, turning it inward, is a way, a shadow way, a dark way of centering you. Let me explain.

It's never been about you. Someone says, "You're doing this and the other thing, and I can't believe that this ..." They're throwing all that drama around and on you. That's actually them and their stuff.

If someone comments on your posts, and craps all over your sunshine parade, that is their problem. It's nothing that you did.

Maybe you did drop the ball. I just heard in the energy, perhaps you might have said something offensive, etc., but everyone chooses how to react, and how to respond to life.

That's their choice. It's on them. You don't have to take responsibility for how they feel.

You do need to own up to who you are and how you show up in this world, absolutely. Clean it up, if you made a mess. That's your mess, but you made that.

Whereas, if someone else makes a mess and starts blabbing about it or spewing all over you about it, that's their stuff.

I really don't know why the guides are having me say this in particular, this week. I know that I'm talking to someone, so I'm going to keep going with it, but this week, it's not about you.

Your business, by the way, if you're an entrepreneur, and you're thinking to yourself:

"Why aren't I doing any better?"
"Maybe I need to implement more, work harder."
"Why don't people like me?"
"Why isn't so-and-so buying in?"

It's not about you. Come out of the ego cave and cage.

The shadow side of centering is reinforcing an identity, so that you can feel and create a sense of stability in your personal ... no, put it that way. The ego she'll bring you in, and be like, something that I did.

Whereas, this is about me, or what's wrong with me? Come out of that cave. There's more outside.

Instead, to flip that, where we're feeling not good enough, it's time to give more. There's so much more love, so much more value, so much more creativity and insight that you're capable of giving. It's about serving.

Tony Robins, I love his quote. "The secret to living is giving absolutely." That's the way to come out of an ego cave.

Know this: If you're not feeling "good enough," then give more to those less fortunate. Focus on WE, not me.

The guides are telling me to pull an Oracle card now. The deck that came forward in this week, is the crystal Oracle cards, in particular, to really weigh in on the topic of this situation.

It's really not about you. It's not about me. It's we. This week, in particular.

Someone just said, pull this card. Amber.

Look at how gorgeous. I love this deck, because it's all pictures. Juicy, juicy amber shot. They're telling me to read.

The words that they've associated with Amber are transparency, calm, purification, and creativity. Here's the reading: "An issue that is causing tension and friction in your life will soon erupt and come to a head."

I'm starting to get the chills. "You are being urged to stay calm during this emotionally-charged event. Express how you feel, but don't be drawn into saying things that you don't mean. This event is, in fact, a blessing. One that is perhaps well overdue."

You can't make this stuff up, people. This is amazing.

"Through it, you will realize where you stand, and how others truly feel. As the air clears, you will uncover a hidden agenda and find creative ways of handling this type of situation in the future. Stay calm, and don't allow yourself to be dragged further into chaos by others. You will emerge from this situation, feeling purified of all the negative emotions and thoughts that have weighted you down recently. Trust and remember it. This event is a blessing."

Here's where we're going to leave off.

Whatever disagreement, argument, or provocative conversation you are about to have this week, remember, it's not about me. This is about we.

Look for the lesson. There's always a dark gift, especially in difficult situations. They always teach us.

Keep your eyes open for the gift. Stay focused on the we. Don't be pulled into that ego cave.

Send me an email back. Comment below. Let me know what's coming up for you around this.

Subscribe on youtube, so that you get your love letters first, and make sure you share this with someone who may be going through something right now, and could really use some positive encouragement.

Sending you so much love. I'll see you next week. Bye.

In Love and Light,

Victoria.

VictoriaWhitfield.com
Facebook.com/SenseiVictoriaWhitfield

Just for Today...

Look for the love and learning in a difficult conversation or argument.

See the difference and disagreement from a third party perspective, considering the pros and cons of the opinions of everyone involved.