Do you feel exhausted after talking to certain people and don't know why?
Annoyed how certain activities suck up way more of your time, yet leave you feeling like nothing much has actually gotten done?
Frustrated that no matter how much you give at work or at your organization, the more they ask of you?
There's a term for things that drain your energy -- spiritually, physically, emotionally, financially, etc. -- and it's called an Energy Vampire.
As hard-working, sensitive, loving and giving people, we tend to attract them -- Yikes!
Watch the above video to learn what an Energy Vampire is, and what to do about it.
"Blah, blah! I 'vant to suck your blood!"
This week’s topic is Energy Vampires.
Now, the vampires we're referring to you are not like the movies where someone comes up to you, bites you on the neck and says, “ha! I got your energy!” drinking it out of you in the literal sense. No, this is very different.
Not everybody knows what an energy vampire is, but this Love Letter is for those who don't know what to do and don't know what an energy vampire is, and as well as for those of us who know all too well what they are, but don't know what to do about it. So let's get to it!
An energy vampire is someone or some thing – like an activity, or a space, an item – that for whatever reason when you are in its presence for an certain period of time, the more you're around them, the more drain you feel emotionally and physically.
What does that mean? The person, place, or thing could be really positive. It could be in Florida, a sunny day at the beach, and everything is supposed to be amazing, right?
You could be at a party spending all this time with these great people who are supposed to be really nice and they're your friends and family, or they're supposed to be your significant other or your children, or your pet, or even your business.
But it still drains you.
Here's how to tell if you're being drained:
If you are in this person, place, or thing's presence for let's say one hour
1) Do you feel more energized, do you feel excited, happy, wired, inspired, lifted up and encouraged?
2) Or after an hour in their presence, do you feel on guard, small, or hiding, or are you saying to yourself “ah, I'm getting tired.”?
The exhaustion starts setting in physically as well as emotionally. You say to yourself “I feel like I'm just talking to a brick wall here. We're getting nowhere, and the more energy I exert, it's like it's not enough.”
The more you give, the more, it takes, or the more hats you have to wear in order to be good enough or acceptable.
The person will tell you more of their life story – and you have to hear it in order for them to "make you understand" how they feel – and they keep talking about how “this happened to me, this and then this happened too...”
They feel great because they got to dump, dump, dump on you.
They’ll often start by saying something like “I just want to share.” or “Let me just get this off my chest” and onto yours, or “Just one more thing” over and over... Sound familiar?
Know This: My time and My space are a "No Dumping Zone." #affirmation #selfcare
Someone in the energy just told me to mention that in psychology, there is a phenomena called the “Doorknob Effect.” An example of this comes up often socially.
Imagine it's the end of your time together with someone – maybe you're doing a session with somebody or maybe someone came over for tea and just to talk and hang out – and you say: "Oh, well, time to go. I got to get going" so you can wrap things up.
You both walk over to the door, and then they touch the doorknob, stop and say, "Oh! One more thing I just thought of..."
It's like the doorknob can activate that “one more thing” for them. Whereas you on the other end are may be thinking, "Oh my god, I gotta go. I want to pee." Yeah... Energy vampires.
Not only on that level, but maybe we're in a relationship with one of them. Sometimes they not only suck our emotional energy and our physical energy, but also our financial energy.
They keep asking you for more, more, more. "Oh, I can't play this bill. Can you cover it?" Or, "Oh, I missed this." Or, "I really want that." It's just an escalation.
Here's the thing: We always want to give abundantly when we feel safe to, but it's important to tune in to how YOU feel when you're giving.
It helps to ask yourself, first: “okay, do I feel like I'm getting so much more spiritually and emotionally? Do I feel supported and sparkling when I give in a big way?” or “Do I feel like, all right, I'm pushing, we're working hard.” or “Maybe one day this person is going to become my vision of what they are” rather than accepting who they currently are at face value.
Ok, that's all well and good Victoria, but why do energy vampires exist? Where does all this come from?
Here's why: If any person, place, or thing is draining your energy – like where they just keep going, going, going as if the story that they're telling doesn't stop, or if they're sharing, they just don't stop talking and share the conversation time with you – it's because they, the person, place, or thing, is supremely ungrounded.
Now, what exactly is “being grounded,” and how does that apply to energy vampires?
You’ll have to watch the rest of this week’s video strategy to find out!
In Love and Light,
Victoria.
VictoriaWhitfield.com
Facebook.com/SenseiVictoriaWhitfield
Just for Today...
Notice if you feel drained, tired or resistant while doing something or talking to someone.
Then visualize a cord between yourself and that person or thing, and see that cord being cut.
Notice how you feel at that moment - you're already healing!
SHARE THIS! You’d be surprised how many people you know right now are in desperate need of healing and could use this information to change their life. If you can read this, you know someone who needs this Love Letter!